Crime 101 (2026) | A cool-looking heist flick that sometimes takes the scenic route, but still lands the plane with Hollywood confidence. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.9/10. Crime 101 starts with a nice upside-down shot of Los Angeles taken at night. Already here, I can tell that this is trying to appear as stylish as possible, and thank goodness, it is. Set against the sun-bleached grit of L.A., this crime thriller follows an elusive thief, played by a very charismatic Chris Hemsworth, whose elaborate robberies along the iconic 101 freeway have authorities scratching their heads. Planning one last giant score (because apparently, criminals in movies always think retirement is realistic), he crosses paths with a struggling insurance broker played by Halle Berry. Meanwhile, a relentless detective portrayed by Mark Ruffalo inches closer to blowing the whole thing apart.

One of the immediate highlights for me was seeing Nick Nolte show up as the head honcho, Money. Nolte just has one of those faces where you instantly believe he has seen some things, and probably yelled at at least three people before breakfast. He brings a gritty old-school energy to Crime 101 that works perfectly for the world it is building.

Then we get Maya, played by Monica Barbaro, who literally crashes into Hemsworth’s life after slamming into his car. They exchange information like normal people after a fender bender, except this is a movie, so naturally, he turns that number into a date opportunity. Smooth? Questionable. Effective? Apparently. But the relationship had me laughing for reasons I don’t think were entirely intentional. Date number one, she is acting completely weirded out about going to some fancy restaurant, like she accidentally wandered into a billionaire convention. Date number two? Suddenly, she rolls up in a jet-black evening dress, looking like she owns the place. Pick a lane, woman! Or maybe more accurately…pick a lane, writer/director Bart Layton.

Speaking of Layton, I would bet good money he has watched Heat a few times. Actually, probably more than a few. Crime 101 shares a few similarities with that classic robbery film from 1995, from the game of cat and mouse to the criminals attempting to get one last big payday. Regardless of whether this similarity originated from Layton or the author of the book, Don Winslow, Crime 101 still had me thinking back to checking out Heat at the drive-in.

Thankfully, Crime 101 develops its characters enough that the story has some depth. Nobody feels like cardboard filler standing around waiting for explosions. The actors keep things entertaining, and the suspense is built up nicely toward the finale. That said, there are definitely some dull moments that occur from time to time when you get the feeling that the movie is stuck in traffic on the 101.

Still, Crime 101 is an enjoyable, stylish crime caper with more than enough gloss, good acting, and showbiz bravado to keep you entertained. With what could easily be regarded as the perfect Hollywood ending. Which works sometimes, and doesn’t always work other times, but after sitting through the entire 142-minute run time, I was willing to let it have its moment.

Crime 101 (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/crime-101-2026/

Lure (2026) | If you’ve ever wanted Saw-lite with less everything and more accidental comedy, this 2026 movie, Lure, has you covered. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.6/10. Somewhere out there, a filmmaker watched Saw, thought “what if this had less money, more awkward acting, and a rich girl handing out death games like party favors?” and thus, Lure (2026) was born.

The movie kicks off with a random guy sprinting through the woods like he is late for the bus, only to get snagged by a conveniently placed barbed wire trap and collected by a mysterious woman. Nothing says “good start” quite like immediately wondering if you accidentally sat on the wrong streaming title. Soon after, we meet Tom (Kit Esuruoso), who arrives at an invitation-only party hosted by the mysterious and alluring Islay (Silvia Presente). And by “party,” I mean a deeply concerning social gathering where tied-up men are casually displayed like centerpieces. Islay politely introduces each one as if she’s hosting The Bachelor: Cult Family Edition.

The setup is simple enough. Six men compete in a series of games to become the perfect suitor for the rich girl. Romantic, right? Of course, there’s a catch. Mouth off to Islay and your head may quite literally explode. The movie wastes little time turning into discount Saw, with a bunch of self-inflicted tasks and survival challenges thrown into the mix. Unfortunately, the quick-cut camera work makes it weirdly difficult to even tell what some of the contestants are actually doing half the time. It feels less like building suspense and more like the editor accidentally drank six energy drinks before touching the timeline.

As expected, logic takes a holiday. Thankfully for Tom, six-shooter revolvers apparently come with magical self-reloading technology in Lure’s universe. Who needs realism when the gun decides, “You know what? Let’s keep this scene moving.”

Performance-wise, Silvia Presente does a decent enough job as the sinister Islay, carrying herself with the right blend of charm and menace. There’s at least something there to keep your attention. Gregory Fung as Markus, though, delivers one of the strangest performances in the film. At times, it genuinely feels like he wandered into frame, unaware filming had already started. The rest of the cast mostly blends into one forgettable pile of disposable victims.

The technical side does not exactly save things either. The effects are basic, the CGI splatter lacks punch, and somehow the music frequently overpowers the dialogue. Granted, nobody is exactly delivering life-changing philosophy here, but it would still be nice to hear what people are saying before someone inevitably gets maimed.

Maybe Lure (2026) would have landed differently if it had existed before Saw. Or if it had a budget bigger than the price of a decent takeaway dinner. As it stands, this is a silly little death-game thriller with a straightforward setup, weak execution, and not much to chew on beyond Silvia Presente’s screen presence.

Lure (2026)

Not the worst horror movie lurking in the bargain bin, but definitely a pass. You can find better.

https://jackmeat.com/lure-2026/

The Housemaid (2025) | Millie gets a dream job & ignores every red flag in sight while Amanda Seyfried is disturbing in the best way. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.4/10. Good to see The Housemaid wastes absolutely no time getting started. Millie Calloway, played by Sydney Sweeney, rolls up to this gigantic mansion looking to interview for a live-in maid position with wealthy couple Nina and Andrew Winchester (Brandon Sklenar). Right away, things feel a little too polished, a little too perfect, and considering Millie is basically living out of her car with a résumé held together by pure confidence and crossed fingers, she assumes there is no chance she lands the job. Of course, if she did not get the phone call shortly after offering her the position, we would have ourselves a very short movie.

Things go sideways impressively fast. It takes roughly one day before Millie realizes Nina Winchester, played so well by Amanda Seyfried, might be just a tiny bit unhinged. And by “tiny bit,” I mean completely off her rocker. The dream job suddenly becomes one of those situations where every room in the house feels like somebody is one bad day away from throwing a vase through a window.

Now, here is where The Housemaid occasionally frustrated me, mostly because Millie might be one of the worst liars ever written. Early on, she gets caught in these painfully obvious fibs, like explaining why she wore glasses during the interview but suddenly not afterward with the incredibly suspicious excuse of, “I do not always wear them, contacts.” Millie… just say you wear them for driving! Problem solved! Crisis averted! Instead, she practically waves a giant “I AM LYING” flag over her head.

And speaking of questionable judgment, Millie continues making decisions that had me shaking my head while also laughing at how obvious some of the setups felt. Already told to stay away from the husband? Sure, why not go see a show with him using tickets you were literally asked to buy for mysterious reasons. Oh, and why stop there? Might as well end the night at a hotel, too. You don't think that gifted phone is tracking you, do you? At several points, The Housemaid had me thinking, "okay, this setup feels way too convenient…somebody is absolutely playing chess here while Millie is stuck playing checkers".

To the movie’s credit, while the first half does not bring many surprises, things improve once the twists start kicking in. I was actually pretty close to guessing where things were headed, but not close enough to nail it exactly, and I am glad. The reveals land effectively even when you kind of feel the movie nudging you in the right direction.

Performance-wise, everyone does solid work, but Seyfried is operating several levels above everyone else. She absolutely owns every scene she is in and walks the line between unstable, manipulative, and oddly fascinating. Sklenar conveys a certain devious side quite well. Sydney Sweeney does fine as Millie, and yes, if you are wondering whether the marketing leaned into Sweeney’s sex appeal, the answer is definitely yes LOL.

Directed by Paul Feig, The Housemaid looks good and moves along at a nice pace. The darkly funny little wrap-up scene at the end honestly ended up being one of my favorite moments in the whole movie.

The Housemaid (2025)

I had no idea The Housemaid was based on a book, so I went in with zero comparison baggage. Although, as always, I am sure somewhere out there the book fans are already sharpening their pitchforks and whispering, “the book was better” LOL.

https://jackmeat.com/the-housemaid-2025/

Project Hail Mary (2026) | The fact that an alien rock-spider became one of my favorite movie characters this year was not on my bingo card. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 8.4/10. Project Hail Mary starts with a body bag, and immediately, I am sitting there thinking, "okay, this is my type of flick," LOL. I know, wrong genre entirely. But when a movie opens with a guy waking from a coma, confused, in space, beside a couple of dead bodies, it definitely gets your attention fast. Turns out it's not horror, just one very confused man aboard a spaceship, seemingly all alone and very far from home.

Ryan Gosling plays middle school science teacher Ryland Grace, who wakes up light-years from Earth with no recollection of who he is, why he is there, or what exactly humanity expects him to accomplish. As his memory slowly comes back, Project Hail Mary fills us in through flashbacks and introduces the very big problem at hand. The sun is dying, Earth is in trouble, and somehow this science teacher has been roped into humanity’s last desperate attempt to stop extinction.

Thankfully, the movie does not spend forever playing the “who am I?” card. Grace regains his memories fairly quickly, so the mystery becomes less about what is happening and more about why he specifically ended up on this mission. Watching him piece things together while trying to science his way through impossible problems keeps things moving nicely, and surprisingly, the science itself is actually fun. The movie throws plenty of scientific concepts at you without making it feel like homework. Although honestly, if Ryan Gosling were teaching science back in middle school, attendance rates probably would have been through the roof.

What really surprised me about Project Hail Mary was the humor. It isn't some laugh-out-loud comedy, but the subtle humor works incredibly well. Then Grace makes contact with his alien companion Rocky, and suddenly the movie becomes a fantastic buddy story I didn't see coming. Watching these two awkwardly figure each other out while teaming up to save not just our sun, but all the stars, was quite entertaining. Rocky quickly becomes the heart of the movie, and their friendship ended up hitting way harder emotionally than I expected.

Sandra Hüller is also excellent as Eva, the organizer behind this impossible mission, bringing a bit of seriousness to the Earth-side story. Also, random fun moment, one of the astronauts is Milana Vayntrub from the AT&T commercials LOL. Definitely had one of those “wait, I know her” moments.

Visually, Project Hail Mary looks fantastic, especially the scenes outside the ship. Even more impressive is learning that they avoided green screen and relied heavily on practical sets. Rocky was largely performed practically as well, with puppetry used so Gosling had something physical to react to, while CGI mainly cleaned things up. Considering Gosling spends most of this movie essentially alone acting opposite his little puppet buddy, he absolutely carries this thing.

Project Hail Mary (2026)

Instead of another sci-fi disaster movie, Project Hail Mary caught me off guard by its surprisingly heartfelt story. One about loneliness, friendship, bravery, sacrifice, and change. I went in basically blind, and I am really glad I did. I expect to be hearing more about this one come Oscar time.

https://jackmeat.com/project-hail-mary-2026/

How to Make a Killing (2026) | Turns out murdering your wealthy relatives is harder when you keep casually visiting them right beforehand. Who knew? #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.1/10. Four hours until execution. I know because the giant text on the screen politely informed me. That is where How to Make a Killing kicks things off, with blue-collar Becket Redfellow (Glen Powell) sitting on death row getting a visit from a priest. Naturally, this means we are about to hear the story of how things went wrong.

The movie rewinds all the way back to Becket’s beginnings, where his obscenely wealthy family gives his pregnant mother a lovely little ultimatum. Abort the baby and stay rich, or keep him and get kicked out of the family fortune. She chooses motherhood, which leaves Becket growing up on the outside while still trying to mold himself into someone worthy of the elite lifestyle he missed out on.

The twist that fuels the whole movie is a legal loophole stating Becket gets the massive Redfellow inheritance if he outlasts every other family member. And by “outlasts,” well…this movie has a very creative interpretation of patience.

Things start innocent enough, but the darker edges creep in pretty quickly, especially when Becket reconnects with childhood crush Julia (Margaret Qualley), who casually tells him, “Call me when you’ve killed them all.” That line alone feels like the movie quietly telling you exactly where this train is headed.

I will admit, if I were planning to eliminate an entire wealthy family, I might go about it with a little more common sense than Becket demonstrates. Maybe avoid meeting up with each relative shortly before they mysteriously die? Just a thought. Thankfully, How to Make a Killing tries more dark comedy rather than believable crime logic, which makes the sillier moments easier to roll with.

Powell does a solid job carrying the film with his usual charm, even when Becket makes decisions questionable enough to make you yell at the screen. Ed Harris as Whitelaw Redfellow also feels like perfect casting. He brings exactly the kind of intimidating rich-family patriarch energy this movie needs, even if the character itself is not especially deep.

There is not much complexity here, and How to Make a Killing never really pushes beyond its basic premise, making parts of it predictable. The writing can feel cheesy and a bit contrived at times, though thankfully, it never becomes overly annoying. It still succeeds at what it sets out to do. Be a fun, easy piece of entertainment.

The movie appears to be a direct remake of Kind Hearts and Coronets, which I have not seen, except that one had Alec Guinness playing eight lead roles, and I am willing to bet his acting was better. LOL.

How to Make a Killing (2026)

At the end of the day, How to Make a Killing did not blow me away in the slightest, but I had a good time with it, and sometimes that is all a movie really needs to do.

https://jackmeat.com/how-to-make-a-killing-2026/

A Town Full Of Ghosts (2023) | A Town Full Of Ghosts looked promising with its creepy setting, but the acting scared me more than the ghosts. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.6/10. Looks like another found footage gem. HAHA. As always, I watch everything so you don’t have to, and A Town Full Of Ghosts is yet another reminder that just because you can make a found footage movie doesn’t necessarily mean the ghost town should’ve stayed haunted by your screenplay.

To be fair, if nothing else, the setting here immediately caught my attention. An old abandoned ghost town? Sign me up. Writer/director Isaac Rodriguez clearly has no intention of letting the shaky cam genre die peacefully, having just released Last Radio Call the year prior, using the same handi-cam approach. Somewhere out there, found footage is refusing to go into the light, and Rodriguez seems determined to keep dragging it back.

He also must have had The Shining on repeat recently because this movie doesn’t just take inspiration from it. It practically borrows the keys to the Overlook Hotel gift shop. Even the production company name, No Sleep Films, feels suspiciously on the nose.

The biggest issue here is the acting, and unfortunately, that’s not exactly a tiny speed bump when your movie relies heavily on audience investment. If the performances had even reached average territory, A Town Full Of Ghosts could have at least landed in “tolerable late-night horror watch” territory. Instead, nearly every character reaction feels painfully unbelievable. Nobody behaves like an actual person would, which made it impossible for me to care what happened to any of them. When bad things started happening, my emotional response was not “Oh no!” and more “Well…anyway.”

Ironically, the setup and location are actually pretty solid. The creepy little town genuinely works, whether it’s authentic abandoned structures or carefully dressed sets. Filming took place at J. Lorraine Ghost Town, and honestly, a quick search about the location is more entertaining than parts of the movie itself. The crumbling buildings, rusted fences, and bizarre maze in the center of town make for excellent atmosphere. It’s exactly the type of place horror fans want to wander around while making terrible choices.

Unfortunately, the story never really capitalizes on those surroundings. The town’s ancient backstory feels flimsy until a hilariously convenient, weirdly over-produced reel of “old” film suddenly appears to explain everything. This supposed ancient footage looked way too polished and professionally terrifying to be believable. Also, tiny question here. How exactly did they get the projector running in a town with no electricity? Unless ghosts suddenly majored in electrical engineering, I must have missed something.

Things really slide into familiar found footage clichés once Mark (played by Andrew C. Fisher) begins losing his sanity after purchasing the town alongside his partner (Mandy Lee Rubio) to turn it into a tourist attraction. From there, it’s the usual FF starter pack. Running through darkness, frantic screaming, shaky camera pointed behind people, and lots of “Wait, what was that?!” moments that stopped being scary for me about 3 decades ago…honestly, probably longer.

Mark’s descent into madness is also strangely rushed. No clever breadcrumbs, subtle character shifts, or eerie psychological unraveling. Just “Here you go, he’s losing it now.” Enjoy. Or don’t.

A Town Full of Ghosts (2022)

Anyone who reads my reviews knows I typically loathe found footage horror, but I still give every one of them a fair shake. So the fact A Town Full Of Ghosts managed to claw its way to a rounded 4/10 from me is, somehow, progress. I didn’t get much out of this beyond a genuinely creepy setting and the occasional accidental laugh, but if abandoned ghost towns are your thing, you might squeeze a little more entertainment out of it than I did. Just don’t expect the ghosts to be the scariest thing here. The acting already claimed that title.

https://jackmeat.com/a-town-full-of-ghosts-2023/

Faces of Death (2026) | Content moderator finds murder videos online and somehow decides investigation is the safest possible career move. It is not. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.9/10. I knew Faces of Death (2026) would come with built-in baggage. I vaguely remember being a kid and hearing it mentioned like it was cursed media. Something that got banned, whispered about, and supposedly showed “real deaths” that definitely made every playground conversation a little more dramatic. Of course, years later, when I finally tracked down the original, it turned out to be…kind of a slow evening of staged shock theatre and curiosity more than anything truly groundbreaking. Still, that mythos never really dies, and this new version knows it.

In this take, Margot (Barbie Ferreira) works as a website content moderator, which already feels like the most cursed job imaginable in 2026. She stumbles onto a series of disturbing clips that appear to recreate deaths from the original film, and suddenly she’s not just scrolling through internet sludge. She’s potentially watching a modern reinterpretation of a very old urban legend. Her last name being Romero is the kind of wink that makes you groan and nod at the same time. Yes, we get it. Horror lineage. Zombies in spirit. Very cute.

While doomscrolling seems harmless at first, this slowly evolves into an obsession when she discovers a VHS of the original film, Faces of Death, from 1978, suggesting that someone is either faithfully reproducing or resurrecting the legend. Arthur, played by Dacre Montgomery, enters the plot with just the right amount of creepiness to guarantee that every move seems like a terrible idea.

Director Daniel Goldhaber actually pulls off some striking camera work here. There are moments where the framing feels almost clinical, like the film is mimicking the detachment of watching violence through a screen. Very on-theme, very uncomfortable. The problem is Margot herself often makes choices that feel less like investigative journalism and more like “how to accidentally speedrun your own disaster.” Even the antagonist feels the need to ask her, "Like, how dumb are you?", which is never a good sign for your hero credibility.

The middle section works best as a messy but engaging mystery-thriller, bouncing between internet culture commentary and the kind of ethical panic that comes with not knowing whether what you’re watching is real. The police subplot, however, takes a hard turn into “no one in this scene has ever met law enforcement” territory. Suspension of disbelief doesn’t just get stretched, it gets folded into origami.

Where the film does land is in its finale. It goes all-in on practical gore and commits to a brutally staged ending that finally feels like it embraces the franchise’s reputation instead of tiptoeing around it. There’s also a fun visual callback in the credits that mirrors the original glowing red aesthetic, which is a nice “we did our homework” touch.

While the meta commentary on the violent nature of society and its penchant for digital voyeurism is evident and sometimes sharp, it does not quite deliver. It seems to be trying to make some deep observations regarding consumption and spectatorship, yet in the end, it comes off as merely an unformed hypothesis.

Still, as a modern riff on an old urban legend turned internet-era paranoia engine, Faces of Death (2026) is far from dead on arrival. Just don’t expect it to answer all its own questions. Like most viral content, it’s more interested in your attention than closure.

Faces of Death (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/faces-of-death-2026/

The Punisher: One Last Kill (2026) | Jon Bernthal returns as Frank Castle, and Disney somehow approved a level of violence that definitely skipped the HR review. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 8.3/10. I have thoroughly enjoyed both seasons of The Punisher on Netflix (now on Disney+), but I am also a huge fan, going all the way back to the comic books and every cinematic attempt to bring Frank Castle to life. Didn’t matter if it was Dolph Lundgren or Thomas Jane taking a crack at the role, I was there for it. So when The Punisher: One Last Kill rolled around as a one-shot TV special starring Jon Bernthal, this thing was basically custom-made for me. His occasional appearances in Daredevil have been entertaining enough, but eventually, there comes a time to stop politely visiting somebody else’s show and let Frank Castle start breaking furniture in his own house again.

The Punisher: One Last Kill follows Frank Castle, a PTSD-ridden veteran trying to survive after his mission is over, only to be dragged back into chaos when wheelchair-bound crime matriarch Ma Gnucci wants revenge after Frank killed her son. If that setup sounds unhinged, congratulations, you understand Punisher comics. And yes, Ma Gnucci popping up instantly made the comic nerd in me grin because she is exactly the kind of wonderfully over-the-top character that belongs in Frank Castle’s miserable orbit. Judith Light plays her with enough menace and weird charm that you can see Who's the Boss.

The special wastes absolutely no time setting the tone. The second Mother by Danzig kicks in, you know Disney forgot where it parked the family-friendly filter. The opening scene on the streets of New York throws us right into Frank dealing with some thugs who, without getting into specifics, definitely picked the wrong city block to act stupid in. And seriously, Frank Castle handing out consequences feels like comfort food at this point.

But One Last Kill also leans hard into Frank’s fractured mental state. He can be seen spiraling, going to his dead wife’s grave, confronting horrific dreams and flashbacks that drive him towards the abyss. It is quite clear that this film revolves around trauma and mental instability, and it actually lands emotionally instead of just using sadness as wallpaper between gunshots. Even Deborah Ann Woll returns briefly as Karen Page, offering Frank motivation in a way that longtime fans will appreciate.

Then comes the action, and wow, this thing remembers exactly what franchise it belongs to. The violence is brutal, hard-hitting, and hilariously not what you expect from Disney. After the initial barrage of beatings, Hatebreed kicks in, and suddenly Frank goes from “sad man with trauma” to “walking natural disaster.” Somewhere in the middle of all this mayhem, Frank even finds time to save an innocent family caught in the crossfire because, beneath all the rage and tactical skull imagery, there is still humanity buried in there.

More than anything, this 48-minute special felt like a reintroduction to the Punisher. A reminder that Frank Castle works best when he is broken, brutal, but still clinging to some reason to keep moving forward. Bernthal absolutely crushes it here, delivering a raw performance that feels angry and hanging on by a thread.

The Punisher: One Last Kill (2026)

Very enjoyable special that has me seriously pumped to see what Frank Castle might get up to when Spider-Man: Brand New Day swings into theaters at the end of July. Because if One Last Kill proves anything, it is that Frank Castle is very, very bad at retirement. My only complaint? I wish it were longer.

https://jackmeat.com/the-punisher-one-last-kill-2026/

Cabin Girl (2023) | An indie thriller that takes a predictable trip into the supernatural with mediocre results. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.3/10. Cabin Girl looked like it had the ingredients for a fun little supernatural mystery. We've got the creepy isolated cabin. Strange small-town vibes. Check. And a lead character poking around where she probably shouldn’t. You know, the kind of setup where common sense packs its bags and has left the building before the opening credits. Unfortunately, while the movie starts with some promise, I ended up guessing the big reveal way too early. Once that happened, a lot of the mystery fizzled out faster than cheap cabin Wi-Fi.

The story follows Ava Robbins (Rose Lane Sanfilippo), a young woman retreating to an isolated cabin under some rather strange circumstances. Naturally, things begin getting weird almost immediately because apparently, horror movie leases come with complimentary supernatural disturbances. The problem is, Cabin Girl rushes headfirst into the strange events without taking much time to build atmosphere or let the tension simmer. Before Ava has really unpacked emotionally, or probably even found where the good coffee mugs are, things are already spiraling into mystery territory.

One of the biggest hurdles is how predictable it becomes. Once Ava’s fascination with the supernatural and the odd local town is introduced, it becomes pretty obvious where this train is heading. And sadly, it’s hard to stay fully invested in a mystery when you feel like you solved the puzzle before the movie has even poured the foundation. There’s also the constant presence of a man watching Ava, which may have been intentional misdirection or atmosphere-building, but it mostly highlighted how underdeveloped everyone else feels. Aside from Ava, most of the supporting characters barely register beyond “person who exists to say suspicious things.”

That said, Rose Lane Sanfilippo does a solid job carrying the film. She gives Ava enough curiosity and unease to make her feel believable, even when the script isn’t doing her many favors. Sanfilippo is clearly putting in the work, and if it weren’t for her, the movie Cabin Girl would definitely not have held my interest. The cinematography also deserves some credit. It works well with the movie’s setting, and it adds to the creepy mood of the film.

Unfortunately, the dialogue doesn’t help matters much. The conversations are quite stiff, the characters always respond in an expected manner, and some of the scenes border on becoming clichés. Rather than having the unusual occurrences seem scary or intriguing, the film seems to be ticking all the boxes of the supernatural thriller genre, like it found a “How To Make A Creepy Cabin Movie” checklist online.

Still, for a Tubi original indie flick, Cabin Girl isn’t completely without merit. There are glimpses of something more intriguing buried underneath the familiar tropes, and it’s made well enough to avoid being a total write-off. It just never fully commits to being surprising. Or memorable. If predictable supernatural stories don’t bother you, there’s enough here for a casual watch, but for me, this cabin came with way too much déjà vu.

Cabin Girl (2023)

https://jackmeat.com/cabin-girl-2023/

Werewolf Massacre: Carnage of the Night Creatures (2025) | I’ve sat through a lot of trash over the years, but this one had me checking the runtime like it owed me money. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 1.3/10. Werewolf Massacre: Carnage of the Night Creatures lured me in with a poster that overshot the movie and made me think, “Maybe this will be some goofy low-budget fun.” Instead, what followed felt less like a movie and more like evidence submitted in a court case against independent filmmaking.

Right from the start, the warning signs are impossible to ignore. A black-and-white introduction features a guy who looks genuinely surprised a camera was suddenly pointed at him, warning us that tonight’s feature may have gone too far and will terrify us. Terrify? No. Confuse? Absolutely. Maybe emotionally scar in the sense that you realize 101 minutes of your life are about to vanish into the void.

The opening scene immediately tells you everything you need to know about the production quality. Two girls talk while cicadas scream louder than the actual dialogue, forcing you into a guessing game of what anyone is saying. Meanwhile, the camera brightness constantly adjusts like someone accidentally left auto-exposure on their phone. Toss in fake rain filters and a “werewolf” mask that looks like it escaped from the clearance bin of a Halloween store, and I started questioning every choice that brought me here.

Then comes the dreaded credit combo. Written, produced, directed by, and starring the same person, James Baack. Sometimes that works. This is not one of those times.

Trying to explain the plot of Werewolf Massacre: Carnage of the Night Creatures feels like explaining a dream you cannot remember to someone you have never met. An undead Pope, a mysterious Chadakoo capable of ending humanity, cowboy thieves for hire, she-wolves wanting domination, and an eccentric adult filmmaker, somehow tangled into the mess. It feels like someone pitched twelve unrelated movie ideas at a bar and yelled, “Perfect!”

To the film’s credit, there are occasional text cards explaining what’s happening, which honestly become essential survival tools because there is almost zero chance you would otherwise know what in the actual hell is going on.

The werewolf rave sequence somehow exists, loaded with random phone effects for no reason whatsoever. Later, a werewolf transformation basically amounts to stepping offscreen, slapping on a mask, and returning while someone experiments with filters from Pika Labs and After Effects. Also, when did werewolves start beating people with sticks? Somewhere, actual werewolf movies are filing defamation lawsuits.

By the final showdown, toy guns are firing at literal toy werewolves being knocked over on camera. I am not exaggerating. You might even recognize some suspiciously dinosaur and Godzilla-looking creatures sneaking into battle like a rejected toy bin crossover event.

Werewolf Massacre: Carnage of the Night Creatures (2025)

By the time the bizarre opening creature finally gets explained, I simply did not care anymore. It has been a while since I’ve seen a movie this catastrophically bad. Werewolf Massacre: Carnage of the Night Creatures isn’t so-bad-it’s-good. It’s “check runtime in disbelief because there are still 37 minutes left” bad. If you survive this one, you’ve earned a medal.

https://jackmeat.com/werewolf-massacre-carnage-of-the-night-creatures-2025/

The Serpent's Skin (2026) | I was on board with the demon tattoo premise, but this felt like three spooky campfire stories awkwardly sharing an apartment. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.3/10. The Serpent’s Skin is an artsy indie horror film that appears much more interesting when read about than when actually seen. The setup had me. Supernatural powers, goth tattoo artists, demons accidentally conjured through ink, romance entangled within it all? Sounds like somebody threw a handful of cool ideas into a blender and hit “puree.” Except now, instead of the mixture, you get the components.

The story follows Anna (Alexandra McVicker), who leaves home after an opening sequence of family tension that mostly involves her parents arguing while she quietly spirals. The film frames her departure as escaping a transphobic environment, though honestly, from what’s heard on screen, it felt less like some dramatic breaking point and more like she simply decided she was sick of being called "lazy". She heads to stay with her older sister, Dakota (Charlotte Chimes), immediately hooks up with Danny (Jordan Dulieu), and in this moment, casually drops that Anna is trans. If that detail was going to tie deeply into the larger supernatural story was what I was wondering. Spoiler alert: not really.

But then comes Gen (Avalon Fast), the dark-haired, tattooed artist who embodies everything that would have been considered cool about the coolest section of a nightclub. Gen and Anna relate on the basis of supernatural abilities, although the film takes its sweet time explaining exactly what those powers are. During one scene, when Anna is attacked during a robbery and suddenly appears with glowing eyes to frighten away the robber, I really believed we were headed down the path of a demonic possession plotline. Nope. Powers. Just superpowers. The movie explains things with the confidence of somebody saying, “Trust me, bro.”

There are plenty of moments where The Serpent’s Skin feels aggressively indie in both good and bad ways. Random angel wings costume for reasons the movie never feels obligated to explain. A band apparently exists solely to stand around pretending to play music without us ever actually hearing any of it. Artistic sex scenes happen in separate rooms with enough moody editing to make you wonder if you accidentally clicked into an experimental student film. Somewhere along the line, Danny morphs into what appears to be an energy vampire. Or maybe he already was? Honestly, the horror side involving vampires, demons, or whatever exactly was happening never lands because the film seems oddly allergic to explanations.

That said, writer/director Alice Maio Mackay does keep things watchable. Budget limitations are obvious, but the effects are perfectly serviceable for a smaller indie production, and several scenes are framed surprisingly well. Visually, there is a lot of artistic flair, and the romance between Anna and Gen feels believable enough to keep me watching.

The biggest issue is that The Serpent’s Skin fails to be a cohesive feature-length movie. It feels more like bits and pieces of stories layered on top of one another. More like your friends at a table at the club are trading ghost stories. There was atmosphere and charm enough to make watching worthwhile, but it mostly slithered right out of my memory.

The Serpent's Skin (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/the-serpents-skin-2026/

Sorry, Charlie (2023) | This flick is more of a thriller than a horror, and its uneven pacing keeps it from ever rising above mediocre. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.3/10. There’s a version of Sorry, Charlie that probably sounded fantastic on paper. A stalking serial killer, eerie urban-legend vibes, and a ticking clock leading up to childbirth. What I got was a film that spends a little too much time putting you on hold and not in a fun, “something’s about to go horribly wrong” kind of way.

The story centers on Charlie, played by Kathleen Kenny, a call center operator who’s already survived one nightmare encounter with a deeply disturbing killer. This isn’t your average slasher villain either. This guy operates with a horrifying “long game,” stalking victims and waiting until childbirth. It’s grim, it’s uncomfortable. It’s one of the more unique setups you’ll come across in a thriller like this. There’s also this creepy “crying baby” lure angle that feels like it should be nightmare fuel, but ends up being more like a flickering lightbulb. Occasionally effective, but not quite enough to light up the whole room.

Where Sorry, Charlie does find its footing is in the psychological back-and-forth. The killer’s taunting calls and Charlie’s lingering trauma create some genuinely tense moments. When the movie actually locks in, you can feel it. Colton Tran knows how to frame suspense and keep scenes moving once the pieces are in place. There are flashes of a much better movie hiding in here.

But getting to those flashes? That’s the real endurance test.

The first half of the film is bogged down in call center monotony. And look, I respect a good “mundane job turns into horror” setup, but this is just a bit too hard into the mundane part. Charlie talking on the phone, existing within her space, and living a lifestyle that may be realistic but certainly not riveting will occupy much of your time. By the time you feel the need for action, you've used up most of your good will.

Another thing that threw me off was the tone. Despite the heavy subject matter, this isn’t really a slasher. If you’re going in expecting bloodbath and gore, you might walk away a bit pissed. I was. The focus here is on survival rather than outright carnage. Not a bad thing, it just doesn’t commit enough to satisfy me. I prolly was expecting the wrong thing.

There are some clever twists sprinkled throughout, and when the film focuses on its darker, more suspenseful elements, it shows real promise. But uneven pacing and a sluggish first act keep dragging it back down to earth.

In the end, Sorry, Charlie is one of those “almost had it” thrillers. It’s not a disaster by any means. You should find a few moments to enjoy. But it never quite delivers on the creepy, high-stakes premise it sets up. Think of it as a decent late-night watch. Just maybe keep your expectations on hold.

Sorry, Charlie (2023)

https://jackmeat.com/sorry-charlie-2023/

The Super Mario Galaxy Movie (2026) | The story is simple, but the movie moves fast enough that I barely noticed as another colorful disaster happened onscreen. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.4/10. The Super Mario Galaxy Movie pleasantly surprised me again. After enjoying The Super Mario Bros. Movie way more than I expected, I was keen to watch this sequel. And my horror-filled brain needed a break from Cheerleader Camp, Protanopia, and people making stupid decisions. Usually in the dark. Sometimes colorful mushrooms and screaming Italian plumbers are exactly the getaway I need.

The film begins with a beautiful, sweeping view of the fantasy world landscape, before introducing Princess Rosalina (voiced by Brie Larson), reading bedtime stories to her radiant star children. As expected, peace doesn’t last even five seconds before a huge mechanical beast comes and kidnaps Princess Rosalina, giving us our new enemy – Bowser Jr (Benny Safdie). From there, the movie wastes no time throwing Mario (Chris Pratt) and Luigi (Charlie Day) into another adventure.

Watching the Mario Bros. cruise motorcycles through the desert somehow feels both ridiculous and completely fitting. The film continues blending classic 8-bit sound effects into the modern animation style, and that nostalgia factor still works like magic. Every little coin sound instantly transported me back to my old-school Nintendo days.

The character Yoshi (Donald Glover) receives his very own introduction through his own montage. Princess Peach discovers that Rosalina has been kidnapped, and she wastes no time setting out for a rescue alongside Toad. At the same time, Bowser Jr. tries invading the Mushroom Kingdom to save his father. Of course, Bowser, voiced once again by Jack Black, being “rehabilitated” lasts about as long as you would expect.

The animation during the action scenes looks fantastic. The directing team once again brings this colorful Nintendo world to life perfectly, and there are plenty of fun easter eggs for us gamer fans. The cameo from R.O.B. genuinely cracked me up because I completely forgot that weird little Nintendo accessory even existed. Then somehow, writer Matthew Fogel gets even nerdier by bringing in Fox McCloud (Glen Powell) from Star Fox. There is also a really fun sequence involving Bowser Jr. using classic Super Mario game traps against Mario and Peach inside the animated world itself.

While I still had a great time with The Super Mario Galaxy Movie, it does fall into the common sequel trap of going bigger and louder instead of simply tighter. The first movie had a little more charm and humor woven naturally into the story. This one occasionally feels more focused on nonstop spectacle. Still, it remains a fun family adventure packed with Nintendo nostalgia, gorgeous animation, and enough humor to keep things entertaining. And yes, stick around after the credits for the inevitable tease of what is coming next.

The Super Mario Galaxy Movie (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/the-super-mario-galaxy-movie-2026/

Perpetrator (2023) | Aesthetically appealing indie flick that has a hard time explaining what it was trying to accomplish. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.2/10. Perpetrator just tried way too hard to be artsy. And the school culture they attempted to emulate just wanted to be Heathers mixed with The Craft so badly (Forbidden Fruits, anyone?). This might have worked in their favor had it been done well, and it was NOT. Writer/Director Jennifer Reeder does show a keen eye behind the camera for the proper angles and flow of scenes, but she missed the mark in the story.

A teen named Jonny, played by Kiah McKirnan, is shown more or less fending for herself in a home where she seems unwanted. I also have to add that McKirnan very much seemed bored in her performance throughout Perpetrator. I don't know if that was by design or if she just didn't have any enthusiasm for the movie as a whole.

Moving on, she is sent to live with her Aunt, and I was glad to see Alicia Silverstone pop up in a role that suited her fine, even if she overacted it a bit. There are plenty of strange visions and dialogue going on that is meant to draw you in; however, I found it like fluff, as I mentioned, trying to add artistic flair. Like the entire story, this is all just kind of swept under the rug and not explained at all. But the general idea is that on Jonny's 18th birthday, she goes through some form of transformation, which is called the Forevering.

A catchy title describing, well, you aren't really sure. Mimicking others' appearance, sort of, I don't know exactly what they were going for in these new "powers" that are bestowed upon her. The ending will not help at all in explaining them either, more or less adding to the confusion. But when a kid from school goes missing, she puts her Sherlock Holmes foot forward and vows to find the culprit.

From there, it is just scenes that don't seem connected very well to the whole mystery of the young adults' disappearances and who may be behind it all. Perpetrator is just stuck trying to be too many things at once and not excelling in any of them. Is it about female maturation during childhood abandonment, or is this a revenge-type flick against male oppression?

I may be reaching on that or any of the many other things you could pick out as potential underlying themes here. It may just be a very mediocre fantasy flick about a supernatural sect of humans that come of age right around the time they can vote. And while it doesn't fail as many horror flix hitting the streaming bus have lately, it still just left me shrugging. Oh well, it did look aesthetically nice, but not something I would recommend. I am sure there is an audience for it, though, just not me.

Perpetrator (2023)

https://jackmeat.com/perpetrator-2023/

Protanopia (2024) | Protanopia doesn’t hold your hand. It blindfolds you, spins you around, and says, “Good luck figuring this out.” #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.8/10. Some movies ease you in. Protanopia throws a Bible verse about cleaning a leprous house into our face, then challenges us to follow along. It is the film equivalent of handing us a puzzle, but half of the pieces belong to another puzzle. Somehow, this seems to be the whole point.

Right from the jump, Protanopia tells you this isn’t going to be a straightforward flick. The title itself, referencing a form of color blindness, isn’t just there to sound artsy in a film festival catalog. It’s basically a warning label. What you’re about to see is fragmented and intentionally disorienting. It starts with ominous narration, eerie music, and a woman sprinting like she just remembered she left the stove on. Except the stove is probably haunted. Then, boom, missing persons flyer. Mallory’s gone. No warm-up, no gentle exposition, just dread.

From here on out, it is all fast cutting and seemingly random visuals. If you are one of those people who enjoy films to gently hold your hand, Protanopia is going to toss you in a dark room and lock the door behind you. Yet, if you allow it, there is a bizarre beat to the madness.

Timothy J. Cox’s Alan Roscoe Jr. is a standout in the “something is deeply wrong here” category. After inheriting his father’s house, Alan treats it less like a home and more like a sacred, possibly cursed artifact. His scenes swing between awkward social humiliation (a homeowners’ meeting that feels like an HOA nightmare) and unsettling introspection. When he starts having visions of his father giving cryptic instructions, the film dives headfirst into low-budget dream logic. Complete with hazy visuals that feel like someone discovered a smoke machine (half the film's budget LOL) and refused to stop using it. What fun.

https://vimeo.com/929606406

Then there’s Luke (Anthony Carey), our emotional anchor. If you can call anyone in this film “grounded.” He’s dealing with his sister’s disappearance while being plagued by visions of the same mysterious house. His interactions with Jack (Matthew Mahler, not to be confused with that bottle of Jack) add another layer of “are we connecting dots or just drawing new ones?”

And just when you think you’ve adjusted to the film’s wavelength, Protanopia hits you with…wait for it. An a cappella sequence. Yes, really. I was seriously wondering, “Did I accidentally switch movies?” but somehow it still fits the film’s dreamlike, off-kilter energy.

The sensory experience here is…aggressive. Around the 55-minute mark, the movie obnoxiously yells at you to stay awake, blaring noise that feels less like a jump scare and more like my TV was staging an intervention. Add in the constant strobing lights and flashing visuals, and we are straddling the line between psychological horror and a full-on sensory endurance test.

However, there is something happening underneath all the chaos. Protanopia can be considered a surrealistic portrayal of solitude, loss, and the deterioration of the suburban neighborhood. There is a certain madness lurking beneath all the manicured lawns and gated entrances, and “Protanopia” manages to capture this madness in its full intensity. Had you said "Budget of $100 Million," I may have had a different reaction. Keep that in mind.

Protanopia (2024)

This isn’t a movie for everyone. And it doesn’t want to be. But if you’re in the mood for something that feels like a hallucination with a story hiding somewhere, Protanopia might be a bizarre trip worth taking. Just don’t watch it if you’re already sleep-deprived. Or prone to questioning reality.

If this sounds interesting to you, check it out for free on Vimeo or FilmFreeway. And thanks go to Timothy J. Cox for sending this one over for me to take a look at.

https://jackmeat.com/protanopia-2024/

Cheerleader Camp (1988) | It’s like someone pitched Friday the 13th but got distracted by Playboy and never circled back to the plot. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.9/10. I've seen slasher movies, sometimes at a summer camp, and then there’s Cheerleader Camp. A film that looks at both of those ideas and says, “What if we added pom-poms, mascots, and a welcome amount of topless distraction?” The concept alone deserves a slow clap. A murder mystery set at a cheerleading camp where even the mascot gets screen time? That’s either genius or a late-night dare that somehow got funded.

The setup is pure ‘80s comfort food. Alison (Betsy Russell) is our troubled lead, haunted by nightmares as she heads into an all-state finals training camp. Naturally, those nightmares start blending with reality once people start dropping like flies. Is she losing her mind? Is she the killer? Or is this just another case of “everyone here is suspicious because the script said so”? You already know the answer is “yes,” to all.

Let’s address the elephant in the cabin. This movie is far more interested in hormones than horror. The “camp” feels less like a training facility and more like a very loosely supervised excuse for characters to remove clothing at a moment’s notice. Not that I’m complaining. This is practically a time capsule of late ‘80s sleaze, but it does mean the actual slashing takes a backseat to…well, bouncing. The filmmakers clearly had priorities, and terror wasn’t one of them.

And the cast, which feels like it was assembled while flipping through a Playboy. You’ve got Teri Weigel popping up as Pam (yes, that Teri Weigel - blink and you’ll miss her being clothed), Rebecca Ferratti thrown in for good measure, and somehow Leif Garrett wanders in as Brent like he got lost on the way to the unemployment office. Meanwhile, George “Buck” Flowers shows up and does what he always does. Quietly steals scenes just by existing.

But the true MVP? Lucinda Dickey as Corey the gator mascot. Yes, really. The Breakin’ star spends this film in a gator suit, and somehow that’s not even the weirdest thing happening. That alone should tell you exactly what kind of flick you’re in for.

In other words, Cheerleader Camp succeeds where it matters. B-grade production, bad acting, and all those beautiful, practical effects that make you realize just why the '80s were great in this genre. Unfortunately, there aren't any really impressive kills in here. If you're looking for the creative gore, you'll probably have to hold your horses while it switches back to skinny dipping.

Dream scenes are definitely a highlight. Concentrating on Alison's jealous and paranoid attitude, along with just enough weirdness to make it entertaining. The problem is that the ending seems rushed, as though the writers finally remembered they had forgotten to add one. No fanfare, no real payoff. Just a cheer and roll credits.

Is this a “good” slasher? Not even close. But is it FUN? Absolutely! If your definition of fun includes low production values, baffling character decisions, awkward dialogue, and a soundtrack that sounds like it escaped from a broken boombox. It’s the kind of movie you throw on, expecting insanity, and get exactly that.

Cheerleader Camp (1988)

Cheerleader Camp isn’t winning any trophies. But as a bizarre, cheer-filled fever dream of the ‘80s slasher era, it definitely earns its place on the watchlist. Just don’t expect the horror to cheer very loudly.

https://jackmeat.com/cheerleader-camp-1988/

The Forbidden City (2025) | She came to find her sister and accidentally started a one-woman demolition job on the Roman underworld. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 7.0/10. The Forbidden City looked like one of those “this could either slap or completely fall apart” watchlist gambles. Basically, it more "punches and kicks" in a way that kept me entertained enough not to complain.

Right out of the gate, you’re dropped into a scenic martial arts training sequence that screams important backstory incoming…except the movie forgets to translate the text explaining it. So unless you’re fluent, you’re just nodding along like, “Yep, mountains…training…this will definitely matter later.” It’s a bold strategy. Confuse first, explain maybe never, but thankfully, the film quickly pivots into something universally understood. People getting absolutely wrecked.

Enter Mei (Yaxi Liu), who wastes no time establishing herself as the human equivalent of a wrecking ball. The opening fight alone is worth the price of admission, featuring tight choreography and one of the more creative uses of a compact disc you’ll ever see. Seriously, somewhere out there, DVDs just got nervous. Mei doesn’t just fight, she improvises, turning anything within arm’s reach into a weapon. It’s chaotic, fast, and a clear nod to some of Jackie Chan's best.

Then we meet Marcello (Enrico Borello), who spends a good portion of the film getting physically and verbally bullied by Mei while trying to figure out what she’s yelling at him, in Chinese. The language barrier becomes an ongoing gag, and honestly, it works. Watching Mei aggressively demand answers while the Italians scramble for Google Translate energy is oddly hilarious. It adds a layer of charm you don’t usually get in revenge-driven action films.

Of course, the tone shifts hard once Mei finds her sister. What starts as a rescue mission turns into a revenge story, and that’s where The Forbidden City kicks into a more emotional side. Director Gabriele Mainetti actually gives these quieter moments room to breathe, pairing them with strong visuals and a fitting score. It doesn’t feel like filler. It feels earned.

The dynamic between Mei and Marcello also develops in a surprisingly natural way. Despite not sharing a language, they still manage to connect. And why not take a nice little scooter ride through Rome that’s equal parts awkward and genuinely sweet. It’s here that the film drops some heavier backstory about the sisters, and it lands better than expected.

That said, the pacing does stumble. The shift from high-energy action to emotional drama can feel a bit like slamming on the brakes at full speed. I am thoroughly enjoying Mei dismantling entire rooms of criminals, and suddenly, I'm in a quiet, melancholic reflection scene. It works individually, but the transitions aren’t always smooth.

But when it comes to the important stuff, The Forbidden City nails it. Innovative action sequences, an unusual intercultural relationship, and just enough emotion to prevent it from becoming a mindless beatdown. And if you enjoy seeing a strong woman take control of a roomful of thugs who can’t even comprehend what she’s saying, this is the movie for you.

The Forbidden City (2025)

https://jackmeat.com/the-forbidden-city-2025/

Captive (2023) | Feels like a horror-comedy that forgot both the horror and the comedy even though Scout Taylor-Compton showed up ready. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.7/10. Just a great poster, combined with a familiar name, can work for me, and this time, Captive (2023) did just that. Put Scout Taylor-Compton in a horror comedy scenario about some stoners sneaking into a house and finding a strange captive in the basement? Yeah, that should be a recipe for chaos, laughs, and at least a few “oh damn” moments.

Instead, it’s more like a recipe where someone forgot half the ingredients…and nearly burned what was left.

The premise keeps these moving early on. A group of party-hungry stoners decides to squat in a random house for the weekend (always leads to good things), only to stumble across something they definitely didn’t sign up for. A chained-up stranger downstairs. That’s a great launching point for paranoia and some darkly comedic stupidity. You can already imagine the arguments, the bad decisions, the inevitable “we should NOT be here” realization.

Unfortunately, Captive mostly just…hangs out.

These characters have been ripped straight out of the “Generic Stoner Archetype Starter Pack,” minus the fun. There are so many opportunities for laughs, and yet the movie manages to fail at being funny despite itself. How do you not find any amusement when you have guaranteed madness, stupidity, and an actual mystery in your basement?

On the horror side? Not much better.

Captive (2023) never quite figures out what it wants to be. It’s not goofy enough to work as comedy, and it is not scary enough to be horror. It simply hangs out in that uncomfortable middle. I kept waiting for it to pick a lane, hit the gas, and take off, but it never did.

On the performance level, Scout Taylor-Compton is the only memorable one. She seems to have walked in right from another film that she actually did well in and is trying to keep it together as best she can. The rest? Well, let’s just say that the effort varies widely. It becomes difficult to root for any particular character’s survival or demise.

And then there are the effects. When your horror elements look like they were filtered through a social media app circa 2015, it’s tough to feel any real sense of dread. Instead of pulling you in, they kind of took me straight out of the moment entirely.

In the end, Captive (2023) is one of those frustrating “almost” movies. The concept is solid. The setup is there. And there are glimpses of what should have worked, but it never comes together. It’s not terrible in a #turkey way, it’s just…there.

Captive (2023)

Think of it as a party you were excited to go to, only to realize halfway through that nobody brought music, snacks, or a keg.

https://jackmeat.com/captive-2023/

Forbidden Fruits (2026) | It’s like The Craft met Heathers at a food court, then spent an hour posing before remembering to be violent. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.2/10. There’s a very specific feel Forbidden Fruits is going for, and to its credit, it commits to it. Even if it sometimes feels like it’s more interested in being cool than actually being, you know, entertaining.

Right out of the gate, the film sets the tone with a radio-dial intro, landing us in full Shudder territory before introducing Apple (Lili Reinhart), who casually manipulates a guy in a parking lot like it’s just another Tuesday. Subtle? Not even slightly. But it does immediately tell you what kind of world you’re stepping into. One where the Free Eden girls rule the mall like it’s their own slightly cursed kingdom.

Apple, along with Cherry (Victoria Pedretti) and Fig (Alexandra Shipp), runs a secret witchy femme cult out of a mall. Of course they do. It’s giving The Craft with a heavy splash of Heathers, and yeah…I could feel those influences in basically every frame. Sometimes that works. Sometimes it feels like the movie is one sarcastic monologue away from just admitting it has both films on speed dial.

The dynamic gets shaken up when new hire Pumpkin (Lola Tung) enters the mix, immediately calling out the group’s performative “we’re all sisters” energy - which, let’s be honest, had red flags all over it from the start. There’s also the legend of Pickle (yes, Pickle), the mysterious fourth member who’s no longer around, complete with a whole “Ballad of Pickle” detour that feels like the film daring you to stay invested.

And here’s the thing. For a solid chunk of its 103-minute runtime, Forbidden Fruits is all buildup. A lot of attitude, a lot of aesthetic, a lot of “look how edgy we are”…and not a whole lot actually happening. You’ll start to feel it creeping in. That little voice in your head going, “Are we going somewhere with this?”

Then, almost on cue, something finally does happen.

The third act kicks in like the movie suddenly remembered it promised horror, delivering a blood-soaked payoff that includes, of all things, a weaponized escalator. Yes, really. And honestly? It works. The kills are creative, the tone fully dives into dark comedy absurdity, and there’s even a twist that doesn’t feel like it was pulled out of a clearance bin. It gives the film a bit of meaning and, shockingly, sticks the landing better than expected.

Bonus points for dodging the typical Hollywood ending, too. It doesn’t go where you think it will, which is refreshing in a genre that often plays it safe.

That said, you can’t overlook the amount of time it takes to get there. Act one and two feel like an extended hangout that doesn’t know when to leave, but not all viewers will be willing to sit through that long for the reward. If you appreciate a good dose of '80s mall culture, however, then this might work for you.

And just when you think it’s all over, the post-credit scene reveals Sharon (Gabrielle Union), because apparently, this mall has more secrets to spill.

Forbidden Fruits (2026)

In the end, Forbidden Fruits isn’t terrible. It’s just uneven. More dark comedy than horror, more vibe than substance for the most part. But when it finally decides to bite, it at least leaves a mark.

https://jackmeat.com/forbidden-fruits-2026/