Sorry, Charlie (2023) | This flick is more of a thriller than a horror, and its uneven pacing keeps it from ever rising above mediocre. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.3/10. There’s a version of Sorry, Charlie that probably sounded fantastic on paper. A stalking serial killer, eerie urban-legend vibes, and a ticking clock leading up to childbirth. What I got was a film that spends a little too much time putting you on hold and not in a fun, “something’s about to go horribly wrong” kind of way.

The story centers on Charlie, played by Kathleen Kenny, a call center operator who’s already survived one nightmare encounter with a deeply disturbing killer. This isn’t your average slasher villain either. This guy operates with a horrifying “long game,” stalking victims and waiting until childbirth. It’s grim, it’s uncomfortable. It’s one of the more unique setups you’ll come across in a thriller like this. There’s also this creepy “crying baby” lure angle that feels like it should be nightmare fuel, but ends up being more like a flickering lightbulb. Occasionally effective, but not quite enough to light up the whole room.

Where Sorry, Charlie does find its footing is in the psychological back-and-forth. The killer’s taunting calls and Charlie’s lingering trauma create some genuinely tense moments. When the movie actually locks in, you can feel it. Colton Tran knows how to frame suspense and keep scenes moving once the pieces are in place. There are flashes of a much better movie hiding in here.

But getting to those flashes? That’s the real endurance test.

The first half of the film is bogged down in call center monotony. And look, I respect a good “mundane job turns into horror” setup, but this is just a bit too hard into the mundane part. Charlie talking on the phone, existing within her space, and living a lifestyle that may be realistic but certainly not riveting will occupy much of your time. By the time you feel the need for action, you've used up most of your good will.

Another thing that threw me off was the tone. Despite the heavy subject matter, this isn’t really a slasher. If you’re going in expecting bloodbath and gore, you might walk away a bit pissed. I was. The focus here is on survival rather than outright carnage. Not a bad thing, it just doesn’t commit enough to satisfy me. I prolly was expecting the wrong thing.

There are some clever twists sprinkled throughout, and when the film focuses on its darker, more suspenseful elements, it shows real promise. But uneven pacing and a sluggish first act keep dragging it back down to earth.

In the end, Sorry, Charlie is one of those “almost had it” thrillers. It’s not a disaster by any means. You should find a few moments to enjoy. But it never quite delivers on the creepy, high-stakes premise it sets up. Think of it as a decent late-night watch. Just maybe keep your expectations on hold.

Sorry, Charlie (2023)

https://jackmeat.com/sorry-charlie-2023/

The Super Mario Galaxy Movie (2026) | The story is simple, but the movie moves fast enough that I barely noticed as another colorful disaster happened onscreen. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.4/10. The Super Mario Galaxy Movie pleasantly surprised me again. After enjoying The Super Mario Bros. Movie way more than I expected, I was keen to watch this sequel. And my horror-filled brain needed a break from Cheerleader Camp, Protanopia, and people making stupid decisions. Usually in the dark. Sometimes colorful mushrooms and screaming Italian plumbers are exactly the getaway I need.

The film begins with a beautiful, sweeping view of the fantasy world landscape, before introducing Princess Rosalina (voiced by Brie Larson), reading bedtime stories to her radiant star children. As expected, peace doesn’t last even five seconds before a huge mechanical beast comes and kidnaps Princess Rosalina, giving us our new enemy – Bowser Jr (Benny Safdie). From there, the movie wastes no time throwing Mario (Chris Pratt) and Luigi (Charlie Day) into another adventure.

Watching the Mario Bros. cruise motorcycles through the desert somehow feels both ridiculous and completely fitting. The film continues blending classic 8-bit sound effects into the modern animation style, and that nostalgia factor still works like magic. Every little coin sound instantly transported me back to my old-school Nintendo days.

The character Yoshi (Donald Glover) receives his very own introduction through his own montage. Princess Peach discovers that Rosalina has been kidnapped, and she wastes no time setting out for a rescue alongside Toad. At the same time, Bowser Jr. tries invading the Mushroom Kingdom to save his father. Of course, Bowser, voiced once again by Jack Black, being “rehabilitated” lasts about as long as you would expect.

The animation during the action scenes looks fantastic. The directing team once again brings this colorful Nintendo world to life perfectly, and there are plenty of fun easter eggs for us gamer fans. The cameo from R.O.B. genuinely cracked me up because I completely forgot that weird little Nintendo accessory even existed. Then somehow, writer Matthew Fogel gets even nerdier by bringing in Fox McCloud (Glen Powell) from Star Fox. There is also a really fun sequence involving Bowser Jr. using classic Super Mario game traps against Mario and Peach inside the animated world itself.

While I still had a great time with The Super Mario Galaxy Movie, it does fall into the common sequel trap of going bigger and louder instead of simply tighter. The first movie had a little more charm and humor woven naturally into the story. This one occasionally feels more focused on nonstop spectacle. Still, it remains a fun family adventure packed with Nintendo nostalgia, gorgeous animation, and enough humor to keep things entertaining. And yes, stick around after the credits for the inevitable tease of what is coming next.

The Super Mario Galaxy Movie (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/the-super-mario-galaxy-movie-2026/

Perpetrator (2023) | Aesthetically appealing indie flick that has a hard time explaining what it was trying to accomplish. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.2/10. Perpetrator just tried way too hard to be artsy. And the school culture they attempted to emulate just wanted to be Heathers mixed with The Craft so badly (Forbidden Fruits, anyone?). This might have worked in their favor had it been done well, and it was NOT. Writer/Director Jennifer Reeder does show a keen eye behind the camera for the proper angles and flow of scenes, but she missed the mark in the story.

A teen named Jonny, played by Kiah McKirnan, is shown more or less fending for herself in a home where she seems unwanted. I also have to add that McKirnan very much seemed bored in her performance throughout Perpetrator. I don't know if that was by design or if she just didn't have any enthusiasm for the movie as a whole.

Moving on, she is sent to live with her Aunt, and I was glad to see Alicia Silverstone pop up in a role that suited her fine, even if she overacted it a bit. There are plenty of strange visions and dialogue going on that is meant to draw you in; however, I found it like fluff, as I mentioned, trying to add artistic flair. Like the entire story, this is all just kind of swept under the rug and not explained at all. But the general idea is that on Jonny's 18th birthday, she goes through some form of transformation, which is called the Forevering.

A catchy title describing, well, you aren't really sure. Mimicking others' appearance, sort of, I don't know exactly what they were going for in these new "powers" that are bestowed upon her. The ending will not help at all in explaining them either, more or less adding to the confusion. But when a kid from school goes missing, she puts her Sherlock Holmes foot forward and vows to find the culprit.

From there, it is just scenes that don't seem connected very well to the whole mystery of the young adults' disappearances and who may be behind it all. Perpetrator is just stuck trying to be too many things at once and not excelling in any of them. Is it about female maturation during childhood abandonment, or is this a revenge-type flick against male oppression?

I may be reaching on that or any of the many other things you could pick out as potential underlying themes here. It may just be a very mediocre fantasy flick about a supernatural sect of humans that come of age right around the time they can vote. And while it doesn't fail as many horror flix hitting the streaming bus have lately, it still just left me shrugging. Oh well, it did look aesthetically nice, but not something I would recommend. I am sure there is an audience for it, though, just not me.

Perpetrator (2023)

https://jackmeat.com/perpetrator-2023/

Protanopia (2024) | Protanopia doesn’t hold your hand. It blindfolds you, spins you around, and says, “Good luck figuring this out.” #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.8/10. Some movies ease you in. Protanopia throws a Bible verse about cleaning a leprous house into our face, then challenges us to follow along. It is the film equivalent of handing us a puzzle, but half of the pieces belong to another puzzle. Somehow, this seems to be the whole point.

Right from the jump, Protanopia tells you this isn’t going to be a straightforward flick. The title itself, referencing a form of color blindness, isn’t just there to sound artsy in a film festival catalog. It’s basically a warning label. What you’re about to see is fragmented and intentionally disorienting. It starts with ominous narration, eerie music, and a woman sprinting like she just remembered she left the stove on. Except the stove is probably haunted. Then, boom, missing persons flyer. Mallory’s gone. No warm-up, no gentle exposition, just dread.

From here on out, it is all fast cutting and seemingly random visuals. If you are one of those people who enjoy films to gently hold your hand, Protanopia is going to toss you in a dark room and lock the door behind you. Yet, if you allow it, there is a bizarre beat to the madness.

Timothy J. Cox’s Alan Roscoe Jr. is a standout in the “something is deeply wrong here” category. After inheriting his father’s house, Alan treats it less like a home and more like a sacred, possibly cursed artifact. His scenes swing between awkward social humiliation (a homeowners’ meeting that feels like an HOA nightmare) and unsettling introspection. When he starts having visions of his father giving cryptic instructions, the film dives headfirst into low-budget dream logic. Complete with hazy visuals that feel like someone discovered a smoke machine (half the film's budget LOL) and refused to stop using it. What fun.

https://vimeo.com/929606406

Then there’s Luke (Anthony Carey), our emotional anchor. If you can call anyone in this film “grounded.” He’s dealing with his sister’s disappearance while being plagued by visions of the same mysterious house. His interactions with Jack (Matthew Mahler, not to be confused with that bottle of Jack) add another layer of “are we connecting dots or just drawing new ones?”

And just when you think you’ve adjusted to the film’s wavelength, Protanopia hits you with…wait for it. An a cappella sequence. Yes, really. I was seriously wondering, “Did I accidentally switch movies?” but somehow it still fits the film’s dreamlike, off-kilter energy.

The sensory experience here is…aggressive. Around the 55-minute mark, the movie obnoxiously yells at you to stay awake, blaring noise that feels less like a jump scare and more like my TV was staging an intervention. Add in the constant strobing lights and flashing visuals, and we are straddling the line between psychological horror and a full-on sensory endurance test.

However, there is something happening underneath all the chaos. Protanopia can be considered a surrealistic portrayal of solitude, loss, and the deterioration of the suburban neighborhood. There is a certain madness lurking beneath all the manicured lawns and gated entrances, and “Protanopia” manages to capture this madness in its full intensity. Had you said "Budget of $100 Million," I may have had a different reaction. Keep that in mind.

Protanopia (2024)

This isn’t a movie for everyone. And it doesn’t want to be. But if you’re in the mood for something that feels like a hallucination with a story hiding somewhere, Protanopia might be a bizarre trip worth taking. Just don’t watch it if you’re already sleep-deprived. Or prone to questioning reality.

If this sounds interesting to you, check it out for free on Vimeo or FilmFreeway. And thanks go to Timothy J. Cox for sending this one over for me to take a look at.

https://jackmeat.com/protanopia-2024/

Cheerleader Camp (1988) | It’s like someone pitched Friday the 13th but got distracted by Playboy and never circled back to the plot. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.9/10. I've seen slasher movies, sometimes at a summer camp, and then there’s Cheerleader Camp. A film that looks at both of those ideas and says, “What if we added pom-poms, mascots, and a welcome amount of topless distraction?” The concept alone deserves a slow clap. A murder mystery set at a cheerleading camp where even the mascot gets screen time? That’s either genius or a late-night dare that somehow got funded.

The setup is pure ‘80s comfort food. Alison (Betsy Russell) is our troubled lead, haunted by nightmares as she heads into an all-state finals training camp. Naturally, those nightmares start blending with reality once people start dropping like flies. Is she losing her mind? Is she the killer? Or is this just another case of “everyone here is suspicious because the script said so”? You already know the answer is “yes,” to all.

Let’s address the elephant in the cabin. This movie is far more interested in hormones than horror. The “camp” feels less like a training facility and more like a very loosely supervised excuse for characters to remove clothing at a moment’s notice. Not that I’m complaining. This is practically a time capsule of late ‘80s sleaze, but it does mean the actual slashing takes a backseat to…well, bouncing. The filmmakers clearly had priorities, and terror wasn’t one of them.

And the cast, which feels like it was assembled while flipping through a Playboy. You’ve got Teri Weigel popping up as Pam (yes, that Teri Weigel - blink and you’ll miss her being clothed), Rebecca Ferratti thrown in for good measure, and somehow Leif Garrett wanders in as Brent like he got lost on the way to the unemployment office. Meanwhile, George “Buck” Flowers shows up and does what he always does. Quietly steals scenes just by existing.

But the true MVP? Lucinda Dickey as Corey the gator mascot. Yes, really. The Breakin’ star spends this film in a gator suit, and somehow that’s not even the weirdest thing happening. That alone should tell you exactly what kind of flick you’re in for.

In other words, Cheerleader Camp succeeds where it matters. B-grade production, bad acting, and all those beautiful, practical effects that make you realize just why the '80s were great in this genre. Unfortunately, there aren't any really impressive kills in here. If you're looking for the creative gore, you'll probably have to hold your horses while it switches back to skinny dipping.

Dream scenes are definitely a highlight. Concentrating on Alison's jealous and paranoid attitude, along with just enough weirdness to make it entertaining. The problem is that the ending seems rushed, as though the writers finally remembered they had forgotten to add one. No fanfare, no real payoff. Just a cheer and roll credits.

Is this a “good” slasher? Not even close. But is it FUN? Absolutely! If your definition of fun includes low production values, baffling character decisions, awkward dialogue, and a soundtrack that sounds like it escaped from a broken boombox. It’s the kind of movie you throw on, expecting insanity, and get exactly that.

Cheerleader Camp (1988)

Cheerleader Camp isn’t winning any trophies. But as a bizarre, cheer-filled fever dream of the ‘80s slasher era, it definitely earns its place on the watchlist. Just don’t expect the horror to cheer very loudly.

https://jackmeat.com/cheerleader-camp-1988/

The Forbidden City (2025) | She came to find her sister and accidentally started a one-woman demolition job on the Roman underworld. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 7.0/10. The Forbidden City looked like one of those “this could either slap or completely fall apart” watchlist gambles. Basically, it more "punches and kicks" in a way that kept me entertained enough not to complain.

Right out of the gate, you’re dropped into a scenic martial arts training sequence that screams important backstory incoming…except the movie forgets to translate the text explaining it. So unless you’re fluent, you’re just nodding along like, “Yep, mountains…training…this will definitely matter later.” It’s a bold strategy. Confuse first, explain maybe never, but thankfully, the film quickly pivots into something universally understood. People getting absolutely wrecked.

Enter Mei (Yaxi Liu), who wastes no time establishing herself as the human equivalent of a wrecking ball. The opening fight alone is worth the price of admission, featuring tight choreography and one of the more creative uses of a compact disc you’ll ever see. Seriously, somewhere out there, DVDs just got nervous. Mei doesn’t just fight, she improvises, turning anything within arm’s reach into a weapon. It’s chaotic, fast, and a clear nod to some of Jackie Chan's best.

Then we meet Marcello (Enrico Borello), who spends a good portion of the film getting physically and verbally bullied by Mei while trying to figure out what she’s yelling at him, in Chinese. The language barrier becomes an ongoing gag, and honestly, it works. Watching Mei aggressively demand answers while the Italians scramble for Google Translate energy is oddly hilarious. It adds a layer of charm you don’t usually get in revenge-driven action films.

Of course, the tone shifts hard once Mei finds her sister. What starts as a rescue mission turns into a revenge story, and that’s where The Forbidden City kicks into a more emotional side. Director Gabriele Mainetti actually gives these quieter moments room to breathe, pairing them with strong visuals and a fitting score. It doesn’t feel like filler. It feels earned.

The dynamic between Mei and Marcello also develops in a surprisingly natural way. Despite not sharing a language, they still manage to connect. And why not take a nice little scooter ride through Rome that’s equal parts awkward and genuinely sweet. It’s here that the film drops some heavier backstory about the sisters, and it lands better than expected.

That said, the pacing does stumble. The shift from high-energy action to emotional drama can feel a bit like slamming on the brakes at full speed. I am thoroughly enjoying Mei dismantling entire rooms of criminals, and suddenly, I'm in a quiet, melancholic reflection scene. It works individually, but the transitions aren’t always smooth.

But when it comes to the important stuff, The Forbidden City nails it. Innovative action sequences, an unusual intercultural relationship, and just enough emotion to prevent it from becoming a mindless beatdown. And if you enjoy seeing a strong woman take control of a roomful of thugs who can’t even comprehend what she’s saying, this is the movie for you.

The Forbidden City (2025)

https://jackmeat.com/the-forbidden-city-2025/

Captive (2023) | Feels like a horror-comedy that forgot both the horror and the comedy even though Scout Taylor-Compton showed up ready. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.7/10. Just a great poster, combined with a familiar name, can work for me, and this time, Captive (2023) did just that. Put Scout Taylor-Compton in a horror comedy scenario about some stoners sneaking into a house and finding a strange captive in the basement? Yeah, that should be a recipe for chaos, laughs, and at least a few “oh damn” moments.

Instead, it’s more like a recipe where someone forgot half the ingredients…and nearly burned what was left.

The premise keeps these moving early on. A group of party-hungry stoners decides to squat in a random house for the weekend (always leads to good things), only to stumble across something they definitely didn’t sign up for. A chained-up stranger downstairs. That’s a great launching point for paranoia and some darkly comedic stupidity. You can already imagine the arguments, the bad decisions, the inevitable “we should NOT be here” realization.

Unfortunately, Captive mostly just…hangs out.

These characters have been ripped straight out of the “Generic Stoner Archetype Starter Pack,” minus the fun. There are so many opportunities for laughs, and yet the movie manages to fail at being funny despite itself. How do you not find any amusement when you have guaranteed madness, stupidity, and an actual mystery in your basement?

On the horror side? Not much better.

Captive (2023) never quite figures out what it wants to be. It’s not goofy enough to work as comedy, and it is not scary enough to be horror. It simply hangs out in that uncomfortable middle. I kept waiting for it to pick a lane, hit the gas, and take off, but it never did.

On the performance level, Scout Taylor-Compton is the only memorable one. She seems to have walked in right from another film that she actually did well in and is trying to keep it together as best she can. The rest? Well, let’s just say that the effort varies widely. It becomes difficult to root for any particular character’s survival or demise.

And then there are the effects. When your horror elements look like they were filtered through a social media app circa 2015, it’s tough to feel any real sense of dread. Instead of pulling you in, they kind of took me straight out of the moment entirely.

In the end, Captive (2023) is one of those frustrating “almost” movies. The concept is solid. The setup is there. And there are glimpses of what should have worked, but it never comes together. It’s not terrible in a #turkey way, it’s just…there.

Captive (2023)

Think of it as a party you were excited to go to, only to realize halfway through that nobody brought music, snacks, or a keg.

https://jackmeat.com/captive-2023/