My quick rating - 5.6/10. From horror’s self-proclaimed Dream Warrior Chuck Russell comes Witchboard, a glossy, pagan-tinged possession flick that kicks off with a surprisingly decent prologue in 1693 France. A coven performs a ritual, blood flies, and boom — we meet the cursed Witchboard, complete with CGI that screams “don’t worry, there’s more where that came from.” Luckily, Russell isn’t all pixels. Whenever the camera leans in close, there are some satisfying practical gags that keep things grounded, at least for a bit.
The titular evil relic ends up abandoned in the woods after a robbery gone wrong (why it is abandoned comes into play later), where young couple Emily (Madison Iseman) and Christian (Aaron Dominguez) stumble across it like it’s driftwood. Bad decisions follow, and then worse ones, until they’re knee-deep in supernatural chaos. The highlight is a banquet scene that goes from refined to Hellraiser-level carnage in seconds. The digital bloodshed is excessive but undeniably fun — if you’re gonna go silly, at least go big.
I vaguely remember the 1986 original being decent, though to be fair, Tawny Kitaen at age thirteen might’ve boosted my critical objectivity. This new incarnation at least builds a coherent mythology around its possession angle, and when the film slows down long enough to let paranoia sink in, the tension actually works. It is, however, very flashback-happy. Every time I got fully immersed, we’d rewind another century like the editor had a quota to meet.
Iseman pulls extra weight here, balancing dual timelines and personalities without slipping into parody. She’s more than your average final girl, and the movie’s better for it. Unfortunately, the climactic effects go full Saturday-morning-CGI, instantly snapping any sense of dread. It’s the exact opposite of the banquet — instead of “whoa,” it’s “oh… okay.” And just when you think it’s over, the movie tosses in one more goofy stinger about religious institutions dabbling in the occult, which would’ve been clever if it didn’t feel like the world’s most awkward post-credits wink.
Would I watch a sequel? Honestly, yes. There’s enough pagan/Wiccan lore here to justify another go, especially if the creative team reins in the digital cheese and tightens up the pacing. Witchboard won’t hit my top ten of the year, but as a glossy, blood-slick occult romp? It’s fun for what it’s worth — even if half the fun comes from rolling your eyes while grinning.
No comments:
Post a Comment