Distort (2025) | This found-footage scare attempt was really barking up the wrong tree of horror entertainment. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.3/10. Let me start with a disclaimer: I’m not the target audience for found-footage films. Never have been. I like my horror with a pulse, a point, and, depending upon the story, a budget. That said, I went into Distort with an open-ish mind… and came out 76 minutes later with a new fear: barking dogs.

The plot, if you can call it that, follows James (James Devlin), a guy who retreats into the woods to record his new album. Because, you know, who doesn't head into the middle of nowhere with a mic and a dream? Sadly, he spends less time making music and more time discovering spooky cassette tapes left like haunted breadcrumbs. These tapes belong to a woman from the ‘90s (the golden age of poor decisions), who was researching an urban legend called "The Weeping Man."

And what horrors await? A creepy old dude sobbing next to a tree (+0.5 for the crying tree guy. That dude committed.) a rabid-sounding dog, and plenty of unlit, unwatchable scenes that give your imagination a real workout. If your favorite part of horror is hearing your neighbor’s golden retriever bark at the mailman, Distort is pure nightmare fuel. If not, you’re going to have a ruff time. (Yes, I went there.)

In a genre where The Blair Witch Project already did everything right 25 years ago, Distort bravely says, “What if we did everything... less right?” The characters exhibit that classic horror logic, like, “Something’s trying to kill me… but I did set the tent up, so let’s ride it out.” James could leave at any time. He doesn’t. Maybe he’s contractually obligated to die in the woods.

Credit where it’s due, though: writer/director Richard Waters does try to put a little spin on the found footage formula. And by “little,” I mean blink and you’ll miss it. But hey, he named his character Richard and cast himself in the role—bold move. A real auteur touch.

Distort (2025)

To sum it up: Distort is like if The Blair Witch Project and a YouTube vlog had a baby, then forgot to feed it plot or light. It tries, it whimpers, and then it barks... a lot. Watch only if you're bored, love dogs, or really need white noise to fall asleep.

Amazon has this one along with some streamer I have never heard of carrying this for free.

https://jackmeat.com/distort-2025/

Black Bag (2025) | It's fun to see a 60s throwback spy thiller that prioritizes dialogue over action and features some excellent performances. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.7/10. In Black Bag, director Steven Soderbergh delivers a sleek, moody espionage tale that strips away the explosive glamour of typical spy films in favor of a grounded, character-driven slow burn. This is not your typical popcorn thriller—there are no car chases, no gadgets, and no over-the-top villains. Instead, we’re treated to a refined and cerebral game of loyalty, deception, and trust, set in a world where whispers are more dangerous than bullets.

The story centers around Kathryn Woodhouse (Cate Blanchett), a seasoned intelligence agent who finds herself under suspicion of betraying her country. Her husband, played with icy precision by Michael Fassbender, is also a legendary agent and suddenly finds himself caught between his loyalty to his marriage and his duty to the nation. It’s a tense setup, and writer David Koepp makes the most of it, weaving in just enough misdirection and ambiguity to keep you guessing without tipping into absurdity.

The opening sequence, a seemingly mundane dinner party, is a masterclass in character setup. With just conversation and glances, Soderbergh introduces us to the key players, planting seeds that quietly grow into larger mysteries. It’s a small-scale scene, but it’s filled with tension that lingers throughout the film. This dinner isn’t just a gathering—it’s a battlefield.

Blanchett, as expected, is superb. She brings layers of vulnerability and quiet strength to Kathryn, making you question her motives at every turn. Fassbender matches her beat for beat, delivering a performance that’s internalized and nuanced, always letting us see the wheels turning behind his unreadable expressions. Their chemistry crackles, even in moments of stillness.

Soderbergh, no stranger to the espionage genre, shoots Black Bag with a loving nod to '60s spy thrillers. There’s a stripped-down elegance to the cinematography—long takes, subdued lighting, and careful framing give the movie an old-school feel. The aesthetic is clean, moody, and deliberate, perfectly mirroring the methodical unraveling of the plot.

This is a film that prioritizes dialogue over action, and while that may deter viewers expecting shootouts or car chases, those willing to sit with the tension will be rewarded. The entire film could very well function as a stage play—so much of it rides on conversations, posture, silence, and subtext. Every word spoken (and not spoken) feels like a clue.

Black Bag doesn’t try to revolutionize the genre. Instead, it refines it. It’s compact, smart, and somber—telling a complete story in 93 minutes without overstaying its welcome. For some, its subdued tone might feel too quiet or too careful, but for others, it’s a refreshing return to spy films that value psychology over pyrotechnics. With powerhouse performances, precise direction, and a tightly wound script, this flick proves that sometimes, the loudest explosions are the ones inside a character’s mind.

Black Bag (2025)

Amazon along with these streamers are carrying this at theater pricing.

https://jackmeat.com/black-bag-2025/

Amityville Clownhouse (2017) | If you are also a glutton for franchise punishment, this #turkey is about as bad as it gets. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 1.4/10. Selected purely due to its merciful 74-minute runtime and my deeply unhealthy compulsion to consume every Amityville-branded atrocity known to mankind, Amityville Clownhouse somehow still managed to overstay its welcome. If watching this movie while laying in bed counts as self-care, then I’m in serious need of an intervention. (This is literally from my full movie database)

Amityville

Let me start by saying: I cannot remember the last time I watched an Amityville movie that didn’t suck. Honestly, I’m beginning to suspect the curse of 112 Ocean Ave. is actually just the filmmakers themselves. This entry opens with a cheap re-enactment of the infamous family murders that, I'm guessing, was meant to be gritty and disturbing. Instead, we’re treated to bargain-bin Halloween-store blood and a clown thrown in for no discernible reason, like someone was dared to ruin two horror subgenres at once.

Enter three fearless explorers, because what better thing to do than hang out in a murder house with a haunted clown toy? They break in, poke around, and then we’re served a good ol’ fashioned found-footage flashback that looks like someone taped over their cousin’s third birthday party. It’s a monkey. A toy monkey. That’s the Big Bad. And yes, it’s as dumb as it sounds. And don't mix it up with that quality Monkey production you recently read about.

Things escalate (or rather, devolve) when the cursed monkey spirit (??) possesses a man who immediately starts smacking his wife around like he’s in a soap opera directed by a sentient potato. It’s hard to judge the acting when you literally can’t hear a single word of dialogue. That’s right, despite clearly audible door slams, bird chirps, and probably the sound of my own disbelief, the conversations are mumbled into the void. I thought Mouse of Horrors had sound issues, but this is next-level. I considered turning on subtitles before realizing there were none and I may as well just imagine what they're saying. Spoiler: it doesn't help.

There’s a moment when the possessed husband tries to gaslight his wife with the classic line, “You’re neurotic, it’s the house that’s haunted.” Look, I get staying in a toxic relationship is complex and painful, but if your partner ever tries to explain away bruises by blaming an evil monkey spirit, pack up your clown shoes and leave.

In the end, Amityville Clownhouse is exactly what it promises: a clown show set in a house with Amityville slapped on the front like a fake Gucci label. The house they continually show doesn't look anything like it, then again, that poster shows a house that also doesn't match. Do not make the same mistake I did. Unless your shelf is already groaning under the weight of cursed mirrors, dollhouses, time-traveling clocks, and haunted VHS tapes all labeled Amityville, just walk away.

Amityville Clownhouse (2017)

But if you must—if you, too, are a glutton for franchise punishment—then honk that red nose and dive in. Misery loves company, after all.

Not sure why but Troma Now has this one along with these other streamers and freebies.

https://jackmeat.com/amityville-clownhouse-2017/

In the Lost Lands (2025) | All the puzzle pieces are here for a great fantasy flick but I felt like I watched a shadow of a better movie. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.3/10. Directed by Paul W.S. Anderson and adapted from a short story by George R.R. Martin, In the Lost Lands had all the ingredients to cook up something memorable. We have a fantasy setting, a quest for ancient power, demons, swords, and a cast that includes Milla Jovovich and Dave Bautista. On paper, that’s a recipe for a wild ride. But what we end up with is a visually ambitious film that feels more like an underwhelming detour than the epic journey it wants to be.

The plot kicks off with a queen who sends the feared sorceress Gray Alys (Jovovich) into the spectral wilderness known as the Lost Lands, accompanied by the wandering swordsman Boyce (Bautista). Their mission? Retrieve a mystical power that can grant transformations. Along the way, they tangle with treacherous humans and deadly demons, all while building a fragile rapport. There’s action, magical lore, and a few narrative turns that try to keep things fresh. The problem is that it never quite gels.

Jovovich and Bautista are solid. Their chemistry is understated but functional, and their dialogue, while sparse and occasionally clunky, ends up working once the film’s central theme is fully revealed. That said, neither performance elevates the material, and both feel constrained by the script so if you weren't fans of them before, this won't be changing your mind. I’m a fan of both actors—Jovovich still owns a place in my movie-loving heart thanks to The Fifth Element, and Bautista has been fun to watch evolve beyond the wrestling ring—but this movie doesn’t really play to their strengths.

Visually, the film leans hard into CGI landscapes, and to be fair, if you like your fantasy worlds drenched in that digital haze, you might enjoy the scenery. Some of the creature designs are straight-up stunning—menacing, weird, and creative in a way that shows off what CGI can do when applied thoughtfully. But for me, the immersive magic was dulled by the constant sense that everything was shot in a warehouse. Even outdoor scenes had that hollow, artificial quality, like the actors were stuck in a snow globe with a green screen.

Anderson usually delivers punchy, stylized action—see the Resident Evil series for evidence—but here the fight scenes lack the kinetic energy or inventive choreography that made those films fun. Sure, the pace is brisk and there’s never a long stretch without something happening, but the action never hits that wow moment you keep waiting for. It’s serviceable, not spectacular.

There are glimmers of what In the Lost Lands could have been. The world-building hints at something grander, and some of the philosophical themes (power, transformation, sacrifice) are intriguing if underdeveloped. But the execution just doesn’t deliver on the potential. The puzzle pieces were there: a strong concept, a capable cast, an experienced director. They just didn’t snap together right.

It’s not a terrible film by any means, just one that leaves you wishing for more, especially given the names attached. If you’re here for fantasy vibes and impressive creature effects, it might scratch the itch. Just temper your expectations. I did, and still walked away feeling like I’d seen a shadow of a better movie.

In the Lost Lands (2025)

Grab some popcorn and flip on Amazon or any of these streamers to check this one out.

https://jackmeat.com/in-the-lost-lands-2025/

Mouse of Horrors (2025) | Sorry about those last couple of reviews of things worth watching, now back to the public domain horror nonsense. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.0/10. The public domain giveth, and the cash grab taketh. Mouse of Horrors boldly asks, “What if Steamboat Willie was a murder-happy maniac who teamed up with a deranged Pooh Bear to harvest human organs and build a DIY Franken-bride?” And I guess someone in a dimly lit basement screamed, “YES, LET’S MAKE THAT!”.

To give credit where it’s due, the opening kill scene where someone gets choked out with their own intestines had me momentarily hopeful. “Maybe,” I thought, “this will be that rare straight-to-Tubi gem.” And then the actors opened their mouths. Or tried to. Hard to tell since the sound mix makes everyone sound like they’re whispering through a kazoo into a pillow.

The performances? Think Spirit Halloween meets local community theater. The lead duo, credited only as “The Killer” and “The Bear” (subtle, guys), are doing their best dime-store cosplay of Mickey and Pooh while playing Operation with live people. And yes, they are building a bride. Because why just kill people when you can also be creepy Frankenstein fanboys?

Danielle Scott is here again, doing what she does in all these public domain horror flicks: surviving, showing up, and sometimes vaguely reacting. She’s basically the horror version of that one background extra who always gets hired because they own their own wardrobe. She's apparently playing Sleeping Beauty next in Fairest of Them All, so we’ll see if she actually gets to lie down and nap through that whole one.

Visually, the drone shots are weirdly high-quality, like the cinematographer briefly borrowed a camera from a real movie before giving it back and going full GoPro duct-taped-to-a-mop-handle. Practical gore? Surprisingly solid at times! You get some old-school splatter and viscera that’ll make you grin. But then they remembered CGI was a thing and… oh no. Just, no. There’s a kill where someone’s eyes are pulled out that reveled in the fact they were doing it.

Plot-wise, there isn’t one. Characters wander in, give a single line of dialogue (when the mic works), and die. The movie is less horror narrative and more PowerPoint of murder vignettes. Any attempt at a character arc or emotional weight was clearly left on the cutting room floor, assuming they had a cutting room and not just a toddler with Adobe Premier.

Then there's the boat fight. Oh, the boat fight. A jarring, inexplicable jump cut takes us from land to open water mid-fistfight, and it just keeps going. Like a drunk slap-fest in a kiddie pool. No rhythm, no stakes, just flailing limbs and confused actors trying to remember their blocking.

If you're here for story, acting, or logic—run. If you're here for weird low-budget nonsense, cartoon-mascot carnage, and intestine strangulation... yeah, you'll get a few chuckles. Just don’t expect Steamboat Willie to steer this ship anywhere but straight into the nearest dumpster fire. A trash barge full of wasted opportunities… but hey, public domain horror is still young. It was better than Piglet LOL.

Mouse Of Horrors (2025)

You know Amazon has this, but FYI, Tubi and Roku are 2 streamers that have it free with ads.

https://jackmeat.com/mouse-of-horrors-2025/

Nine Bodies In A Mexican Morgue: Season 1 (2025) | This show is a visually appealing, twisty survival whodunit with standout performances from its core cast and a mystery that earns its resolution. #jackmeatstv

My quick rating - 6.5/10. Nine Bodies in a Mexican Morgue sets up a familiar story and delivers a mostly satisfying one-season mystery that fans of the whodunit genre should find worth their time. The show follows nine strangers who survive a plane crash only to find themselves stranded in a remote Mexican jungle, and then, one by one, they begin to die. What starts as a survival tale quickly turns into a murder mystery, where every character becomes both suspect and potential victim.

Visually, the show makes a solid effort. The sweeping aerial shots of the jungle are genuinely stunning, and even when it's clear some of the environments are sets, it doesn’t pull you too far out of the experience. The contrast between natural scenery and fabricated surroundings is noticeable, but forgivable given the show’s generally engaging atmosphere and solid pacing.

Where Nine Bodies stumbles slightly is in its acting. The lead performers—particularly David Ajala and Eric McCormack—hold things down well and bring needed weight to the central narrative. Lydia Wilson is good, though at times feels underutilized or not quite as assertive as the role might require. Meanwhile, the supporting cast fluctuates in quality; some characters feel like filler or archetypes rather than real people, with a few bit players seemingly unsure of their place in the story. The older couple leans into their stereotype well enough, though their brief political commentary feels oddly tacked on and doesn’t really seem necessary.

The structure might feel confusing at first, especially as the show flips between events surrounding the crash and the external perspectives of characters involved in the broader mystery. It can take a moment to find your footing, but once you do, the payoff is worthwhile. The full arc is well thought out, and the ending doesn’t cheat us. You won't be left with that frustrating "wait, what?" feeling—it all wraps up with satisfying clarity.

The mystery element is handled with restraint and intelligence. Anthony Horowitz crafts a solid puzzle, avoiding the temptation to throw in twists just for shock value. If you like to play detective, you’ll have enough clues to start forming theories, and while I had a hunch about the killer, I wasn’t fully sure until the reveal. That uncertainty is what makes a mystery work, and on that front, the show succeeds.

While it’s marketed as a limited series, Nine Bodies in a Mexican Morgue does end on a tantalizing cliffhanger that leaves the door cracked open for a potential second season. Whether that will happen likely depends on the show’s reception, but even if this is all we get, it stands as a complete, cohesive, and entertaining mystery ride.

Nine Bodies in a Mexican Morgue (2025)

This show is a visually appealing, twisty survival whodunit with standout performances from its core cast and a mystery that earns its resolution. Some uneven acting and minor tonal hiccups aside, it’s a binge-worthy series for mystery fans—and one that ends with just enough intrigue to make you hope for more.

You can check this out on MGM+ and through a few other streamers including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.com/nine-bodies-in-a-mexican-morgue-season-1-2025/

The Rule of Jenny Pen (2025) | This flick delivers a more unsettling psychological horror experience than traditional horror and is carried by its strong performances. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.1/10. This flick is a darkly atmospheric psychological thriller cloaked in the unlikeliest of places: a serene, slow-paced elder care facility. Here, aging bodies house Here, aging bodies house some sharp and some failing minds, and secrets crackle just beneath the surface. The setting is almost deceptively calm until John Lithgow’s performance shatters any illusion of peace.

Geoffrey Rush plays a former judge now imprisoned within his own unresponsive body after a stroke. Confined to a wheelchair and unable to communicate without a condescending tone, Rush brings a haunting presence with just his eyes and subtle expressions, something few actors could pull off. His character’s frustration and helplessness radiate in the staff's dismissal of his claims, making him both a tragic figure and a desperate, silent observer to the increasingly sinister events unfolding around him.

Lithgow, always a master of complex roles, is perfectly cast as the home’s resident bully—an elderly psychopath who hides behind charm and a child's puppet named Jenny Pen to psychologically terrorize fellow patients. It's not just the horror of what he does that disturbs me but how he does it: manipulation, mental cruelty, and slow, calculated torment. Watching Lithgow toy with his victims, sometimes mid-conversation while casually wielding the puppet, is unsettling in the best way.

George Henare rounds out the central trio as Tony, another resident whose interactions bring moments of poignancy and depth to the otherwise bleak tone. The Rule of Jenny Pen is largely a three-person stage play, and without these powerhouse performances, it might’ve collapsed under the weight of its confined setting and minimalist plot.

Director James Ashcroft (working from a short story, which is referenced in the credits) leans into the claustrophobia and psychological tension. There’s a subplot hinted at, one that could have broadened the narrative or provided deeper insight, but it remains underdeveloped. Perhaps intentionally so, to preserve the tight, almost novella-like feel of the film, but it leaves a trace of dissatisfaction for anyone hoping for a more expansive payoff.

What the film lacks in scope, it makes up for in emotional unease. It’s a slow burn built not on what’s seen, but what’s felt. No gore, no physical violence or jump scares in the traditional horror sense, just aging minds under siege, a puppet with an unnerving smile, and a quiet war for sanity in a place meant for peace.

The Rule of Jenny Pen won’t be for everyone. It's more unsettling than scary, more psychological than thrilling. But with its strong performances, especially from Lithgow, who turns puppet-play into something truly nightmarish, leaves a lingering chill. Just don’t expect answers or a world beyond the narrow hallways of this unsettling rest home.

The Rule of Jenny Pen (2025)

This Shudder original can be found on Amazon along with a slew of other streamers.

https://jackmeat.com/the-rule-of-jenny-pen-2025/

Opus (2025) | A cautionary tale about the destructiveness of celebrity obsession and media vultures that ends up all pop, no bang. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.8/10. I really thought this set the stage for something big—a chilling dive into the dangers of fame, the toxicity of idol worship, and the seductive pull of mythologized celebrity. With a premise this intriguing and John Malkovich at the center as a vengeance-driven, long-lost pop icon named Moretti, I was bracing for fireworks. But what I got was more of a slow burn that never quite ignites.

The story follows Ariel, a young writer played by Ayo Edebiri, who’s invited to a lavish and remote compound where the long-disappeared Moretti has re-emerged, surrounded by a bizarre entourage of journalists, hangers-on, and devoted fanatics. It’s a ripe setup, and Edebiri carries the narrative well. She gives Ariel a mix of intelligence and cautious curiosity, even if she pieces things together a bit too quickly for the tension to really marinate. Occasionally, her facial expressions didn’t quite match the tone of the scene, but that felt more like a quirk than a flaw.

Malkovich, unsurprisingly, is the film’s biggest asset. His performance as Moretti is magnetic—equal parts bizarre, bitter, and mesmerizing. There’s an eerie allure to how he commands every scene he’s in. You want to know what his endgame is, and he plays it with a kind of menacing grace. Juliette Lewis also brings some grounded chaos to the mix as one of the journalists—potentially one of the many who wronged Moretti in the past.

Visually, the film has style. The compound is elaborate and visually striking, and there’s a slightly dreamlike, almost hallucinatory quality to some of the locations that fits the film’s surreal tone. But for a movie that flirts with thriller and psychological horror elements, Opus feels oddly restrained. There’s little sense of real danger, and even once the ensemble realizes they’re pawns in Moretti’s twisted plan, the tension just never fully lands.

The special effects, while competent, are used sparingly, and the sense of dread is diluted by the film’s slow pacing and tame escalation. When the final act rolls around, it’s all wrapped up a bit too neatly, lacking the punch or emotional resonance it felt like it was aiming for.

There’s a message here—a cautionary tale about the destructiveness of celebrity obsession and media vultures—but it never digs deep enough to feel truly biting. Without Malkovich anchoring the madness, this would have scored lower for me. It’s all atmosphere and concept with not enough impact or narrative bite.

Not a bad film by any means, just not the one I hoped it would be. Opus has the ingredients for something compelling, but it never fully delivers on the promise. All pop, no bang.

Opus (2025)

Still theater priced on Amazon along with these streamers.

https://jackmeat.com/opus-2025/

Through the Door (2024) | Fans of low-budget genre films and time travel conundrums, this may be worth a watch to see how creative choices can outshine flashy effects. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.9/10. In Through the Door, director Matt Kincses proves that you don’t need a massive budget to deliver a compelling sci-fi narrative. Set almost entirely inside a cryptic warehouse, the film follows a content creator documenting what initially seems like a fringe experiment but quickly spirals into a mind-bending time travel tale. The setup is minimal, but the ambition is clear, and more often than not, it pays off.

The film explores the concept of a mysterious time portal, one that gives desperate souls the chance to be reborn, starting life over again from birth with no memory of their previous selves. It’s a bold and thought-provoking premise that flirts with science fiction and metaphysical questions about identity, regret, and second chances. The script doesn’t go as deep as it could in exploring these themes, but it lays enough groundwork to make the viewer stop and ponder: Would you do it?

Lola Claire stars as Jane, a 23-year-old grappling with whether her life is already beyond repair. Her motivation to reset her existence might seem a bit forced or underdeveloped, but her performance carries enough emotional weight to keep the character grounded. The supporting cast, while not spectacular, is serviceable and fits the stripped-down nature of the production.

What really stands out to me is how the film embraces its limitations. Rather than relying on cheap visual effects to represent the more surreal elements—like the enigmatic, power-wielding “guard” who tries to prevent interference in the timeline—Kincses leans into suggestion and performance. A simple raised hand from this mysterious figure speaks louder than any bargain-bin CGI. Sure, it's a little hokey at times, but it's also strangely more effective than the alternative.

That said, Through the Door isn't without flaws. The pacing lags in sections, especially when the characters are just meandering through the warehouse and interacting with the overly cryptic “gatekeeper.” The tension never quite escalates the way it could, and there’s a feeling that the film is one or two rewrites away from something truly impactful. Still, there are enough twists peppered in to maintain interest, and the film's central question keeps the narrative afloat.

Is it pure time travel? Is it multiverse theory? The film doesn't draw clear lines, and while that might bug some viewers, others may appreciate the ambiguity. Either way, the ideas at play are interesting enough to elevate the film beyond its budgetary constraints.

Through the Door isn’t a home run, but it’s a commendable indie sci-fi effort that respects its audience's intelligence and doesn't try to overreach. For fans of low-budget genre films and time travel conundrums, it’s definitely worth a watch—even if just to see how creative choices can outshine flashy effects.

Through the Door (2024)

As of now, Amazon is your go-to streamer but I'll link Justwatch for future reference.

https://jackmeat.com/through-the-door-2024/

The Monkey (2025) | Stephen King brings us an entertaining horror/comedy with a toy monkey that is just taunting us with "Who dies next?" #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.5/10. Stephen King is really all I need to hear to check out a horror flick, and The Monkey delivers a fun, twisted time, even if it comes with a few annoying strings attached. The premise is delightfully simple and plays out with the gory rhythm of a Final Destination movie: there’s a creepy toy monkey that beats a drum, and every time it stops, someone dies. You’d think that would get old fast, but the filmmakers keep the kills inventive and tongue-in-cheek enough to keep you watching. There's even a mid-movie death montage that feels like the writers going, “We know, we’re behind, let’s catch you up real quick.” And it works.

Theo James pulls double duty as adult Bill and his twin, Hal—both of whom, at both ages, are just wildly frustrating characters. Not because of the acting, which is perfectly serviceable, but because of the way they’re written. Adult Bill in particular is infuriating. The guy refuses to clue his kid in on what’s happening, again and again, and it's hard not to scream at the screen. His stubbornness and refusal to cooperate undercut some of the fun, and it started wearing on me pretty early.

Still, even with my frustrations, I had a good time. The kills are creatively gory, the humor lands, and there's a consistent creepy charm to the monkey itself. Adam Scott pops up early on, and it was great to see him away from the corporate Lumon hellscape of Severance and into something a little more deadly.

There’s a bonus trailer after the credits—more of a tease for a new film than a sequel. (Screenrant has the breakdown if you're curious.) I’ve never read King’s original short story, but something tells me that ending went in a very different direction on the page.

Despite some annoying character choices and a plot that felt a little too one-note by the end, The Monkey still manages to entertain. That says a lot because if not for Bill being the human version of a wet blanket, I might’ve rated this even higher.

The Monkey (2025)

This one is making the rounds on most streamers, including Amazon, for theater pricing at home.

Anyone read the short story? Curious how the source material handled it.

https://jackmeat.com/the-monkey-2025/

The Forest Clown (2025) | A clowny campfire tale if you're a fan of horror movie clichés and don’t mind a little self-aware chaos. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.0/10. So, here’s the deal with The Forest Clown: It’s one of those horror films where you can practically hear director Lukas DiSparrow giggling behind the camera. A camping trip turns into a bloodbath as a group of strangers encounters a mad clown. But don’t let that premise fool you—this isn’t just your average slasher. It’s a playful wink to all the classic horror clichés that we love to roast.

Right off the bat, the group of characters make the cardinal sin of horror movie survival—splitting up—after literally just saying, “We shouldn’t split up.” And you know what? They do it anyway. You could almost hear DiSparrow facepalm through the screen. Classic. The horror comes quick and brutal, with the killer clown popping up just when you think you’re safe, like some kind of twisted game of “Where’s Waldo?” But instead of looking for a red-and-white striped sweater, you’re searching for a forest-dwelling clown.

The acting is surprisingly decent at first—natural, even. But then, once the bodies start piling up, it’s like they all took a crash course in How to Act Like You’ve Never Seen a Horror Movie Before. I’m talking about the kind of “stupid” that makes you think, “Are these guys trying to get killed or is this a clever satire?” Spoiler: It's both.

Now, credit where credit’s due—they’ve got budget constraints, but they hide them well. Instead of relying on cheap CGI gore, they cleverly use blurring and dodgy camera angles to give us the horror without all the goo. It’s so subtle, I was almost impressed. And honestly, this little bit of sleight of hand made the movie unintentionally funny... but maybe that was on purpose? Who’s to say?

The pacing, however, is a whole different story. It’s like they took a scenic route through the forest and then got lost for 30 minutes. The characters are doing the “oh no, we’re gonna die” thing while the obvious plot twists fly right over their heads. You’d think they’d get it after the 20th time the killer clown shows up, but nope, they’re still scratching their heads.

Now, let's talk about the killer forest clown. Is he supernatural or not? Who cares, honestly? At some point, I stopped asking questions and just let the madness take over. The lack of clarity only adds to the chaotic fun. By the time the credits roll, you're almost certain the filmmakers were just messing with us. The final moments are the best part of the movie, as it feels like the cast and crew realized they were in on the joke too. Respect for that and bumps the rating up.

Forest Clown credits

The Forest Clown is the kind of film that misses almost everything you expect from a good horror flick, yet still manages to avoid being a total disaster. It’s not a masterpiece by any stretch, but it did escape from being a #turkey. If you’re in the mood for a laugh and a killer clown who might be supernatural (but who really cares?), then this one's for you. Or maybe you saw Horror Stories, which this is an offchute of. I missed that one and don't intend on trying to find it.

Would I recommend it? If you're a fan of horror movie clichés and don’t mind a little self-aware chaos, give it a watch. Just be sure to leave your common sense at the door and don't expect much.

The Forest Clown (2025)

Amazon does have this one to rent, not sure about other streamers since Justwatch didn't have any.

https://jackmeat.com/the-forest-clown-2025/

Y2K (2024) | A fun throwback with some great moments, but ultimately too scattered to be memorable. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.3/10. Y2K kicks off with a bang, riding the nostalgia wave straight into the heart of 1999, but somewhere along the way, it forgets to keep the party alive. The setup is solid—two high school misfits crashing a New Year's Eve bash on the brink of the millennium, only to get swept up in some wild, tech-fueled chaos. The opening scene even flirts with horror, making you think you’re in for something in the vein of Maximum Overdrive meets Superbad. But by the time the credits roll, it's clear the film couldn’t decide what it wanted to be.

Let's talk performances. Jaeden Martell as Eli is… well, bland. His shy, awkward demeanor doesn’t add much beyond making him forgettable. Julian Dennison, on the other hand, is a blast as his best friend Danny, stealing every scene he’s in. It’s a shame he’s not in more of them. Rachel Zegler and Lachlan Watson round out the main cast well, each embodying their Breakfast Club archetypes (popular girl and geek, respectively) without overdoing it. Then there’s Kyle Mooney, who pulls double duty as a stoner character and the film’s director. His comedic bits mostly miss the mark, but since he was juggling multiple roles, I’ll cut him some slack.

The real wildcard? Fred Durst. Playing himself, he’s fully in on the joke, letting the movie poke fun at him in ways that’ll either have you rolling or cringing, depending on your tolerance for late-’90s music references. (If you ever rocked out to Limp Bizkit, you’ll probably get a kick out of it.) The best moment? The kids’ brutally honest first impression: “WOW, you look like shit!” (2021 Durst is hilarious, Click for a full show in Chicago.)

The film’s biggest issue is its identity crisis. It teeters between satire, sci-fi horror, and raunchy comedy but never fully commits to any of them. The tech-apocalypse angle is a fun nod to Y2K hysteria, but it leans too much into parody without fully embracing the madness. It’s self-aware to a fault, constantly winking at the audience instead of building real stakes.

If you were in your 20s around the turn of the millennium, there’s enough nostalgia here to keep you entertained—though younger viewers might be left scratching their heads. And while the movie’s references hit home for me (especially the Family Values Tour shoutouts—one of the best concerts I ever attended), it doesn’t do enough to resonate beyond its target audience. Y2K is a fun throwback with some great moments, but ultimately too scattered to be memorable. It’s got the vibe of a mixtape with a killer opener that just sort of fizzles out by the end.

Y2K (2024)

There are quite a few streaming options for this one including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.com/y2k-2024/

Renner (2025) | A bold but uneven indie sci-fi that takes a predictable premise and pushes it somewhere worthwhile with strong performances and a gutsy finale. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.2/10. It's refreshing to see a film with some guts again, and Renner certainly doesn’t shy away from its bold finale. The story follows a computer genius who designs an AI life coach to help him navigate love, only to realize too late that he’s unknowingly programmed his manipulative mother into the system. While the setup is highly predictable, the film manages to redeem itself with an unexpected swerve that adds real weight to the narrative.

As an indie sci-fi drama, Renner never quite explodes into something extraordinary, but it flirts with that potential thanks to strong performances and an engaging second half. Frankie Muniz has evolved into a well-balanced actor, delivering a nuanced performance that carries much of the film. It was also a nice change of pace to see Violett Beane in a role outside of the superhero genre as she brings charm and depth to the nosy neighbor/love interest.

The real standout, however, is the sheer audacity of how the story plays out in the end. Whether it was director Robert Rippberger’s choice or the writers crafting multiple possible outcomes, the finale delivers a rare sense of commitment that's worth appreciating. Be warned, though—the last half-hour goes all in, making for a chaotic and gripping finish.

That said, Renner isn’t without its flaws. There are moments where you will be yelling at the screen, frustrated at the characters’ obliviousness to the obvious. But if you can roll with that, the film serves up some solid indie sci-fi entertainment with an edge. It's a bold but uneven indie sci-fi that takes a predictable premise and pushes it somewhere worthwhile. Worth watching for the performances and its gutsy finale.

Renner (2025)

Amazon leads the limited streaming choices here.

https://jackmeat.com/renner-2025/

Val Edward Kilmer (December 31, 1959 – April 1, 2025) | An absolute tragic loss today of a man who I was a huge fan of. Might pop on Real Genius tonight. RIP Mr. Kilmer. #jackmeatsflix

I wish I was making an April Fools joke, but unfortunately, this exceptional actor has lost a battle to pneumonia and passed away. To say I am a fan is an understatement. I believe half of my sarcasm in high school came from the movie Real Genius (clip below) Kilmer was a part of just so many great movies. I would rehash his amazing career, but I think the Hollywood Reporter does a nice job of it for me.

An absolute tragic loss today of a man who I was a huge fan of. I might have to pop on Real Genius tonight and watch my personal favorite role of his and smile. RIP Mr. Kilmer.

Val Kilmer

What was your favorite Val Kilmer movie?

https://jackmeat.com/val-edward-kilmer/

Forest of Death (2023) | If you are gonna watch this flick, get ready for a weekend getaway all the way to the land of bad decisions! #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.5/10. The classic horror trope with a group of friends heading to a remote cabin for some much-needed R&R. Cue the ominous forest, the skinwalker lurking nearby, and, of course, the "splitting up" moment that happens in record time—literally less than 10 minutes in! Seriously, I thought they were trying to set a new world record for the worst decisions. But hey, at least they got the clichés out of the way early, right? Well, let me just put it like this. If someone told you an insane sounding story that seems very implausible to ever happen, AND the next thing you know, the EXACT thing that was just described starts happening, wouldn't you give that warning story some creed? Not these folks, nope, not at all.

Let’s talk about the acting—because, oh boy, it's a rollercoaster. At some points, I was convinced I was watching a community theater production where everyone forgot their lines. In fact, I’m pretty sure I saw one actor glance down at a cue card mid-scene. That said, it gives the movie this charmingly awkward vibe, like you're rooting for them to survive just because you're watching a blooper reel unfold in real time.

Now, this film actually has some potential. The creative camera work and eerie shots of doppelgangers are the real MVPs. These moments are genuinely unsettling, but they’re too few and far between. Instead of indulging in their budget-friendly, freaky visuals, they decided to throw in some not-so-convincing practical effects that felt like they were trying to be too ambitious. Spoiler alert: When the "creature" does show up, you’ll be wishing they stuck to what worked: spooky shots of people who aren’t who they say they are.

As for the horror… well, there are a couple of chills here and there. But overall, it’s like a haunted house with too many plastic skeletons. You’ll find a few moments that actually make you jump, but not enough to keep you glued to your screen. It’s the kind of film you’ll watch if you’re a hardcore horror fan who’ll take whatever is handed to you… or if it’s just on in the background while you do other things (you know who you are).

In the end, Forest of Death barely scrapes by with a rounded-up 4 out of 10. It's not a complete disaster, but it’s not a gem either. It’s like that weird snack you regret buying—it’s not terrible, but you’re probably never going to finish it.

Forest of Death (2023)

If you are gonna watch this flick, get ready for a weekend getaway all the way to the land of bad decisions! That being said, there are some streaming options for you, including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.com/forest-of-death-2023/

The Rig (2023) | This supernatural thriller is a worthwhile binge if you are interested in the mysterious force in the fog around this oil rig. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.0/10. Set on a remote Scottish oil rig, The Rig kicks off with an eerie, supernatural premise as a dense fog rolls in, isolating the crew and unleashing forces beyond their comprehension. The show thrives on its claustrophobic setting, creating a palpable sense of dread, with stunning visuals and impressive special effects amplifying the unease.

Iain Glen does a good job through both seasons as Magnus, the head honcho of the rig, bringing a steady, commanding presence to the role. Emily Hampshire also stands out with a solid performance as the strong female lead, always managing to rein in the macho guys when they veer too far into tough-guy mode. Martin Compston had an interesting and pivotal role, though it seemed to shift between seasons, making his character arc feel slightly inconsistent.

Season 1 is an engaging slow-burn mystery, filled with tension and unanswered questions that kept me hooked. It borrows elements from The Mist, The Thing, and Alien, but never enough to feel derivative—it blends familiar ideas into something uniquely its own. The pacing is tight, the mystery intriguing, and the performances solid across the board. (7/10)

Unfortunately, Season 2 loses steam. The momentum built in the first season fades as the show struggles to maintain the same level of tension and intrigue. The writing feels lazier, relying on familiar tricks that no longer hold the same impact. While it does attempt to break away from its earlier inspirations, the execution doesn’t quite land, making it a less compelling watch. (5/10)

With the way things ended, the door is left open for continuation, but if the show were to return, it would likely take a very different direction from what we’ve seen so far. Whether that’s a good or bad thing remains to be seen, but as it stands, The Rig works best as a full binge, especially now that a third season seems unlikely.

The Rig (2023)

This show is still an Amazon exclusive.

https://jackmeat.com/the-rig-2023/

Riff Raff (2025) | If you enjoy dark comedies with crime elements and an all-star cast, this flick is well worth a watch. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.2/10. Director Dito Montiel delivers an engaging dark comedy in Riff Raff, a film that takes a familiar story and reinvents it with sharp writing, a well-paced narrative, and a stellar ensemble cast. Montiel, known for his ability to craft character-driven stories (A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints), keeps the film moving at a brisk pace. At just 103 minutes, Riff Raff manages to juggle backstory, character dynamics, and escalating tension without feeling bloated. The dialogue is sharp and witty, making even the film’s heavier moments feel engaging rather than weighed down by melodrama.

The film wastes no time in setting up its premise. Vince (Ed Harris), a former criminal who turned his life around, enjoys a quiet life with his wife, Sandy (Gabrielle Union), and their good-natured son, DJ (Miles J. Harvey). But their peaceful New Year's Eve is thrown into chaos when Vince’s estranged son, Rocco (Lewis Pullman), arrives unannounced with his pregnant girlfriend, Marina (Emanuela Postacchini), and his brash, trouble-stirring mother, Ruth (Jennifer Coolidge). Rocco’s arrival isn’t just a social visit—he’s on the run, and hot on his trail is the aging but dangerous mobster Lefty (Bill Murray), who has a personal vendetta that threatens to turn this family reunion into a bloodbath. While the story itself isn't groundbreaking, the way it's told keeps things fresh. Montiel manages to weave past and present seamlessly, ensuring that every emotional beat lands while maintaining a tense and often darkly humorous atmosphere.

The real highlight here is the cast. It’s hard to single out one standout performance because the chemistry between the actors is what makes Riff Raff shine. Each character feels lived-in, and their interactions elevate the material beyond a typical revenge thriller. The dialogue is particularly well-crafted—natural, witty, and at times biting—adding depth to these characters and their motivations.

While the film might not break new ground in terms of story, its execution is what makes it stand out. The strong performances and Montiel’s skillful direction keep you engaged right up to the final moments. If you’re drawn to any of the actors involved, you’ll likely be hooked from the start. But if the names don’t entice you, the film’s impact might be a little less potent.

If you enjoy dark comedies with crime elements and an all-star cast, Riff Raff is well worth a watch. The writing, performances, and pacing ensure that even a familiar story feels fresh. It balances tension, humor, and action effectively, making it an entertaining watch with a cast that truly brings it to life.

Riff Raff (2025)

Here are plenty of streaming choices to pick from, including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.com/riff-raff-2025/

Cleaner (2025) | Think Die Hard with a female protagonist and instead of being trapped IN the building she is stuck 50 stories up outside the building. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.5/10. Die Hard meets Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning in Cleaner, a high-altitude action thriller that delivers solid fight choreography and well-filmed sequences but struggles to elevate itself beyond standard popcorn fare.

Daisy Ridley stars as Joey, an ex-soldier-turned-window-cleaner who finds herself in an impossible situation, suspended 50 storeys (before you spellcheck, that is the British spelling ;) up outside a London skyscraper when a group of radical activists storm an energy company’s gala, taking 300 hostages, including her younger, autistic brother. What follows is a race against time as Joey battles both the terrorists and the unforgiving elements, scaling the building in a desperate bid to save those trapped inside.

Ridley commits fully to the physical demands of the role, and the action sequences are crisp, well-choreographed, and engaging. The setup is refreshing in that it flips the usual Die Hard-style formula, keeping Joey on the outside looking in, which leads to some tense, vertigo-inducing stunts. However, where Cleaner falters is in its character development and storytelling. Joey’s personal stakes, particularly the sibling dynamic meant to drive her motivation, feel undercooked, making it difficult to form a strong emotional connection.

Clive Owen, unfortunately, is given little to do, a disappointing waste of talent in what could have been a memorable supporting role. The villains are serviceable but lack the depth to be truly compelling, and the film doesn’t offer much in terms of originality beyond its unique premise.

That said, if you go in expecting a straightforward action flick, Cleaner delivers enough entertainment to be worth a watch. It’s a well-executed but ultimately forgettable thriller that does just enough to keep you engaged—nothing more, nothing less.

Cleaner (2025)

Amazon, along with these streamers have this for theater-at-home pricing (03.29.25)

https://jackmeat.com/cleaner-2025/

Womb (2025) | Based on true events of fetal abduction, which is horrific, unlike this movie, which is scary in a different way. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.7/10. This movie starts with a gruesome bang, claiming to be based on true events of fetal abduction. While there have been real-life cases of this horrifying crime, any sense of realism goes out the window pretty quickly. It’s as if writer Mike Walsh got halfway through and thought, “Nah, I don't want it this crazy.” And proceeded to go into a more tame suspense mode.

Taylor Hanks, playing our pregnant protagonist, does a decent enough job, but the script does her no favors. Her character makes choices that range from frustrating to outright baffling. Meanwhile, the little girl who enters the story spends most of the movie looking like she just realized she’s in a film, which is… a choice.

The flick does have tension and moves at a brisk pace, but that doesn’t mean it’s good. It’s the kind of film that keeps you watching, not because you’re enthralled, but because you keep hoping it’ll turn into the movie it could have been. Instead, it keeps delivering moments that make you yell at your screen, "Are you serious?"

Spoiler Territory: The Stupidity of It All

• A guy refuses to kill yet thinks casually removing someone’s eyes with a hunting knife and believes the person is surviving? Sure. Science is just a suggestion in this universe.
• The villain is willing to let a mother and child die but, when handed a loaded gun at point-blank range, just… does nothing. Woman, what is your endgame!
• The movie works so hard to convince you it’s a horrifying true crime story, only to abandon that for a straight-up kidnapping. Did we forget the horror tag?
• The killer? The other victims, wait, how? Didn't he/she succeed in the very beginning? I'm done.

Would Womb resonate more with mothers? Maybe. Would it resonate with anyone who appreciates coherent writing? Probably not.

Womb (2025)

Not an abundance of streaming options out there, but here is what Justwatch has right now.

My initial rating might be generous after thinking this through next day. What is your opinion? (jump in with stars or comments to discuss)

https://jackmeat.com/womb-2025/

Last Breath (2025) | This flick is an intense, edge-of-your-seat experience that commands appreciation for the extreme dangers of deep-sea diving. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.8/10. This flick plunges us into the perilous world of deep-sea diving, following a team of seasoned saturation divers as they risk everything to save a trapped crewmate hundreds of feet below the ocean’s surface. This gripping survival thriller delivers a tense, visceral experience that immerses you in the unforgiving environment of underwater maintenance, where danger lurks with every breath.

The film’s strongest asset is its sheer realism. The underwater sequences feel suffocatingly claustrophobic, making it clear just how terrifying and intense this kind of work truly is, especially in the face of raging seas. The story is one of resilience, teamwork, and the unwavering bravery required for a job that keeps vital infrastructure running in some of the most hostile conditions on Earth. It sheds light on the often-overlooked world of saturation divers, whose work at depths of up to 1,000 feet ensures the Internet pipelines crisscrossing the ocean floor remain intact.

While Last Breath isn’t the most emotionally charged film at first glance, it sneaks up on you with its human moments, delivering unexpected depth. The dynamic between Woody Harrelson, portraying a veteran diver on the brink of retirement, and Simu Liu, the younger, gung-ho counterpart, is serviceable but not groundbreaking. Their performances inside the diving “bell” are solid, though not the film’s highlight. Where the film truly shines is in its high-stakes boat sequences. The storm-tossed vessel, recreated with stunning CGI, brings a brutal authenticity to the film, making you feel every violent sway and crashing wave.

Even if you’re familiar with the real-life story that inspired Last Breath, the film presents it in a way that still makes it worth the watch. Director Alex Parkinson nicely followed up his documentary about the same event (and same name) with this feature-length flick. It’s an intense, edge-of-your-seat experience that commands appreciation for the extreme dangers of deep-sea diving. Just maybe don’t watch it right before bed like I did. It’s the kind of movie that lingers with you, making you grateful for every breath you take on solid ground.

Last Breath (2025)

Theater at home pricing on Amazon among these other streamers. Links will be the same when the price drops.

https://jackmeat.com/last-breath-2025/

Heretic (2024) | If you’re a fan of slow-burn tension and sinister mind games, this flick is well worth your time. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.9/10. Scott Beck and Bryan Woods deliver a well-crafted psychological horror in Heretic (2024), a tense and gripping tale that explores faith, manipulation, and survival. Starring Sophie Thatcher as Sister Barnes and Chloe East as Sister Paxton, the film follows two young missionaries who unwittingly step into the lair of Mr. Reed, played by a chillingly diabolical Hugh Grant. What starts as a routine house call quickly devolves into a deadly game of cat-and-mouse.

The film does a remarkable job of drawing us into Mr. Reed’s twisted narrative. The dialogue is sharp and engaging, making every interaction feel weighty with subtext. The tension builds steadily, and the movie kept me hooked, feeding you small but tantalizing pieces of the mystery as it unfolds. Even with its confined setting, mostly within the walls of Mr. Reed’s house, there is always a sense of hidden depth, something yet to be discovered.

Visually, the film excels. The house itself, along with its eerie model counterpart, is wonderfully designed and adds an extra layer of unease. It’s a shame they didn’t utilize these elements a bit more, as they had great potential to elevate the psychological horror aspect even further.

The performances are what really made this flick. Grant embodies a menacing yet charismatic antagonist, his portrayal of Mr. Reed both captivating and unsettling. Thatcher and East do a fantastic job as the reluctant heroines, bringing vulnerability to their roles, making their characters’ plight all the more compelling.

However, where the film slightly falters is in its conclusion. Without spoiling anything, the ending felt like it could have been “more.” While the buildup was strong, the resolution seemed to take the easier route instead of something more profound or impactful. It’s possible that my expectations were steering the story in a different direction in my head, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was a missed opportunity to deliver something even greater.

Despite this, Heretic remains a solid psychological horror entry, effectively keeping its audience on edge throughout. Had I completed my top ten list for last year, this would have likely made the cut. Beck and Woods have certainly demonstrated their skill in crafting tight, well-edited scenes and keeping the suspense taut. If you’re a fan of slow-burn tension and sinister mind games, Heretic is well worth your time.

Heretic (2024)

Plenty of streamers to choose from including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.com/heretic-2024/