A respectable attempt to show a different side of JCVD in this neo-noir action/thriller, but it falls short of being truly memorable. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.5/10. Jean-Claude Van Damme steps into a more grounded and dramatic role delivering a neo-noir thriller that diverges from his usual high-octane, martial arts-heavy fare. With minimal fights and a focus on boxing over the acrobatics he’s known for, Van Damme portrays Russell Hatch, an aging Interpol operative who becomes a surrogate father to Jayden, the son of a slain informant. Years later, Hatch is drawn into protecting Jayden and his grandfather from a deadly gang war, embodying a protector who will stop at nothing to ensure their safety. The film leans heavily into its noir atmosphere, with a moody, gritty tone that matches Hatch's introspective narration—though the latter is a mixed bag. While Van Damme’s voiceover helps propel the story and gives insight into his character's mindset, it can also feel distracting and overly explanatory at times. His performance, however, is solid, embracing the weariness of a man who’s seen too much yet refuses to back down. Action fans may be disappointed by the film’s restrained approach. This isn’t a Bloodsport or Kickboxer revival; the fights are sparse, grounded, and lack the intricate choreography of Van Damme’s glory days. Instead, it focuses on character-driven tension and Hatch's emotional journey, showing a more vulnerable side of the star. The cast includes notable cameos from Kristanna Loken, Cynthia Rothrock, Shannen Doherty, and even Eric Roberts, whose brief appearance harkens back to his Best of the Best days. These moments add nostalgic charm but don't significantly impact the story. The acting is competent across the board, with JCVD doing his best to carry the emotional weight of the film. While the pacing and narration occasionally stumble, the movie manages to maintain intrigue through its gritty aesthetics and moments of intensity. However, it never quite commits fully to its neo-noir ambitions, nor does it embrace its action roots enough to satisfy die-hard fans of the genre. For those seeking a more mature and reflective take on Van Damme’s repertoire, this flick offers an entertaining yet uneven experience. It’s not a straight-up action flick, so temper your expectations, but it does showcase the star's range and willingness to evolve with age. A respectable attempt to show a different side of JCVD, but it falls short of being truly memorable. Suitable for fans of neo-noir or those curious about seeing Van Damme step out of his comfort zone.

Amazon might be the only place to see this as of 05.10.24 but check Justwatch later.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/darkness-of-man-2024

Pretty much a misfire on nearly every level. From its unoriginal script to its amateurish execution. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.3/10. The story here is a straightforward premise. A group of ex-military members on a mission to recover stolen money clash with a lone hunter who gets to it first. Unfortunately, the execution of this concept leaves much to be desired, making this film an exercise in endurance rather than entertainment. Even with a relatively short runtime of 94 minutes, the movie still feels painfully slow. Its bland pacing and uninspired action sequences left me yearning for something—ANYTHING—to break the monotony. The story is riddled with clichés and predictable beats, with nothing to elevate it above the countless other films that have tackled similar plots (and done it far better). The attempt to introduce a new action hero out of Chris 'C.T.' Tamburello falls flat. His performance as Will Walker lacks the charisma or physicality to carry an action film, leaving you disengaged and indifferent. Coupled with uninspired direction by Justin Lee, who has made better films, the characters fail to leave any impression, let alone make you care about their fates. The technical shortcomings are glaring. The sound design is a prime example, with overly loud, distracting footstep noises drowning out dialogue in several scenes. It’s as if the microphones were strapped directly to the actors’ shoes, capturing every crunch of gravel at the expense of coherence. Add to that poor set decoration that fails to establish any sense of authenticity or immersion, and the film feels more like a hastily thrown-together student project than a professional production. Plot twists, which should inject excitement or intrigue, instead come across as illogical and baffling. They serve no purpose other than to pad the runtime, making the story feel even more convoluted. Simply put, Hunting Games is a misfire on nearly every level. From its unoriginal script to its amateurish execution, it’s hard to find redeeming qualities in this snoozefest. Ok, Danny Trejo and Bruce Dern are here briefly but they cannot save the script even with their star power. If you’re looking for an action flick to get your adrenaline pumping, you’d be better off revisiting old classics because this one doesn’t hit the mark.

A few streamers have this along with Tubi for free with ads.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/hunting-games-2023

Netflix budget + Kevin Hart = Another popcorn flick requiring you to check common sense at the door and enjoy the fun. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.7/10. Netflix continues its blockbuster formula with this flick, a big-budget action flick starring Kevin Hart as a criminal mastermind. The premise—a heist crew attempting to steal $500 million in gold from a plane cruising at 40,000 feet—is as outrageous as it sounds. And while the movie doesn't aim for greatness, it delivers a fun, escapist experience that doesn’t take itself too seriously. The story, while engaging, feels like it was cobbled together by an algorithm. It’s riddled with ridiculous turns, nonsensical technobabble, and an over-the-top caper that stretches plausibility to the limit. But that’s part of the charm—if you’re willing to embrace the absurdity, it becomes an enjoyable ride. Hart leads a likable ensemble cast, and while his performance doesn't break new ground, his charisma and comedic timing add levity to the ordeal. The action sequences are well-executed, with high-octane set pieces that keep the energy levels up and flash the budget spent to deliver them. The film’s musical score complements the action nicely, enhancing its escapist vibe. That said, this movie is far from flawless. The middle portion suffers from pacing issues that drag the story down, and the plot holes are big enough to, well, fly a plane through. It’s not a serious crime drama with intricate twists or profound characters—it’s a popcorn movie through and through. Ultimately, Lift works best when you turn off your brain and go along for the ride. It’s light, forgettable entertainment with just enough charm and action to make it worth a watch. It’s not the best movie you’ll see this year, but it’s a decent way to kill 107 minutes if you’re in the mood for something fun and ridiculous at the same time.

Obviously, the Big N is the only game in town, but Justwatch may show something later.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/lift-2024

This flick is a must-watch for fans of the thriller genre expertly telling a dark and gripping tale about a complicated assassin. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 7.1/10. Fincher's latest cinematic venture is a tour de force that explores the intricacies of the assassin's psyche, expertly played by the incomparable Michael Fassbender. As the tagline suggests, in this film, execution is everything, and thanks to Fincher's directorial prowess, every element falls seamlessly into place. The plot unfolds after a fateful near-miss, thrusting our protagonist into a high-stakes battle against both his employers and his own inner demons. The story takes us on an international manhunt, a journey the assassin insists isn't personal, yet the nuances of his performance reveal a character grappling with a profound internal conflict. Fassbender's portrayal of the assassin is nothing short of captivating. He brings depth and complexity to the character that transcends the traditional mold of a hardened killer. The subtle nuances in his performance allow us to empathize with his struggle, blurring the lines between right and wrong, and turning the film into a gripping exploration of redemption. David Fincher, known for his meticulous attention to detail and masterful storytelling, once again proves his directorial prowess. The film is a visual and narrative triumph, with each scene meticulously crafted to enhance the tension and suspense. Fincher's signature style permeates every frame, creating a dark and immersive atmosphere that adds to the film's overall impact. The supporting cast also deserves accolades, particularly Tilda Swinton in her role as the expert. Swinton's performance is excellent, bringing authenticity to a character that adds layers to the intricate web of the plot. Her interactions with Fassbender's assassin are charged with intensity, contributing significantly to the film's overall dynamic. But this isn't just a story of action and suspense; it's a character study that delves into the human condition. The film challenges conventional notions of morality and explores the possibility of redemption in the most unexpected places. It keeps you on the edge of your seat, balancing heart-pounding action with moments of quiet introspection. In conclusion, The Killer is a triumph for David Fincher and a testament to the acting prowess of Fassbender. With its expertly crafted narrative, stunning visuals, and standout performances, this film is a must-watch for fans of the thriller genre. It's a dark and gripping tale that lingers in the mind, showcasing that, in the hands of a master like Fincher, execution truly is everything.

This is a Netflix exclusive right now, check Justwatch later on for other options.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/the-killer-2023

I thought this was an amusing tribute to the glory days of action cinema and a reminder of the value of preserving independent theaters. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.4/10. Well, this movie delivers a clear, heartfelt message: Don’t let independent theaters fade into obscurity. While this undercurrent provides some emotional weight, the film itself is a mixed bag of charm, parody, and missteps. At its core, the movie centers on a proud indie theater owner (Terrence Howard) and his battle against corporate developers determined to demolish his family business. Dolph Lundgren is perfectly cast as a washed-up action star, and his self-aware performance is one of the film's highlights. He plays the role with a wink, embracing the absurdity of the premise and leaning into the parody of the action heroes of yesteryear, including himself. On the other hand, Howard seems to be in a different movie entirely. He approaches his role with a level of intensity that feels out of sync with the film's tone, as if the script were making a serious commentary on the plight of independent cinemas. While this earnestness might resonate with viewers who share his passion for the cause, it feels misplaced amidst the movie’s playful homage to and mockery of classic action flicks. The pacing is another weak spot. The action takes far too long to kick off, leaving much of the first half feeling sluggish. When the climactic showdown finally arrives—occupying the film's last third—it’s more amusing than exhilarating. The action sequences, while fun and full of nods to classic action tropes lack the intensity or stakes needed to make them more memorable. Despite these shortcomings, the film’s charm lies in its lightheartedness. The abundance of silly fight scenes and stolen one-liners from action classics lends it a playful energy. It’s clear Orson Oblowitz has a deep love for the genre he is poking fun at, which makes the humor endearing even when it doesn’t land perfectly. Showdown at the Grand is a modestly entertaining watch, especially for fans of old-school action movies who can appreciate its tongue-in-cheek approach. While it falls short of being a great movie, it succeeds in being an amusing tribute to the glory days of action cinema—and a not-so-gentle reminder of the value of preserving independent theaters.

There are several streamers carrying this one with Amazon being among the cheapest.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/showdown-at-the-grand-2023

Speaking of Die Hard, per tradition, I watched the 10/10 rated Xmas movie for replayability last night. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 8.8/10. One of the greatest action movies of all time and also happens to be a Xmas classic even if Bruce Willis won't admit it (see this link from The Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis) Again, I am not going to go too far into this since entire books have been written on the subject. The late Alan Rickman turns in the performance of a career as the thief Hans Gruber in a very straightforward heist that goes anything but simple. The action is non-stop, the humor is perfectly timed and John McClane just keeps coming back. Needs to be in the rotation of any action movie fan on Christmas eve for sure. 'Nuff said.

Justwatch has all kinds of options for you to watch this one including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/die-hard-1988-1

If you are a die-hard fan or a newbie to the Watchmen world, this animated 2-parter is well-made and recommended. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.9/10. Chapter II continues the legacy of its predecessor, delving deeper into the gritty and morally complex world of Alan Moore’s iconic graphic novel. This animated sequel retains the brooding atmosphere, sharp commentary, and intricate character dynamics that made the Watchmen franchise a staple in the superhero genre. While it ventures further from the source material than both Chapter I and the 2009 live-action film, these deviations ultimately serve as both its greatest strength and minor stumbling block. The story picks up with Nite Owl and Silk Spectre emerging from retirement, thrust into an investigation that not only tests their abilities but also their convictions. The backdrop of a society teetering on the brink of nuclear annihilation provides a palpable tension, mirroring the themes of moral ambiguity and ethical dilemmas central to the Watchmen universe. The changes to the story structure and added scenes are bold and, at times, polarizing. For fans of the graphic novel, the deviations may feel jarring, especially as certain moments feel reimagined rather than adapted. However, these shifts eventually find their footing, allowing the narrative to flow with a momentum that honors the spirit of the original while carving its own path. For newcomers, the streamlined storytelling might make the dense, multi-layered plot of the source material more accessible. Visually, this flick is stunning. The animation captures the noir aesthetic of the comics, with meticulous attention to detail in character design, setting, and atmosphere. The production quality is top-notch, and the care put into recreating the Watchmen world is evident in every frame. The music is another standout element, with a score that enhances the emotional weight and urgency of the unfolding events. While the film doesn't quite match the philosophical depth and narrative intricacy of the graphic novel, it does succeed in translating the essence into a different medium. The alterations, though initially disorienting, eventually reveal themselves as necessary compromises for the sake of pacing and cohesion. For fans of the original comic, this might not perfectly align with their vision of the story, but it still offers a compelling and faithful extension of the universe. For those new to the franchise, these films provide an engaging entry point, capturing the core of what makes Watchmen so enduring. Whether you’re here for the thought-provoking narrative or the exceptional production design, Watchmen Chapter II delivers a satisfying continuation of the saga.

You have a few streaming options on top of Amazon to choose from.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/watchmen-chapter-ii-2024

I am glad I popped these flix on this year for Xmas since they offer plenty of entertainment for fans of absurd horror. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.3/10. This Xmas sequel picks up where the quirky and chaotic original left off, with Zoe (Andrea Laing) attempting to leave her nightmare behind by fleeing to another country. Unfortunately for her (and fortunately for us), the infamous murder log isn’t bound by borders and seems just as eager to branch out as she is. One of the film's highlights is its commitment to practical gore effects, which are not only nostalgic but also executed brilliantly. The effects team clearly had a blast bringing the murder log's chaotic carnage to life. From splinters flying to full-on mayhem, the gore is as satisfying as it is absurd. Giving the log a "host" to utilize was a creative and fun twist. The humor also lands well, with Zoe's constant ax-toting becoming a running gag that, while repetitive, is undeniably funny. It’s a clever nod to the absurdity of her situation. What else would you carry when being stalked by a homicidal piece of wood? While the sequel tries to match the bizarre charm and irreverent tone of its predecessor, it doesn’t quite hit the same heights. Some of the silliness feels a bit forced, and the pacing occasionally drags as it leans too heavily on familiar beats. That said, it still delivers some memorable moments, especially when it fully embraces the over-the-top premise. Ultimately, this flick is a solid sequel that doesn't quite recapture the magic of the first film but still offers plenty of entertainment for fans of absurd horror. After all, how can you go wrong with a killer log? It may not be everyone's cup of cocoa, but for those who love their holiday horror served with a side of splinters and satire, this one is worth a watch.

I am guessing this is MAX again but Justwatch doesn't have anything yet.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/adult-swim-yule-log-2-branchin-out-2024

This movie is a unique blend of humor, horror, and sheer audacity, and is a must-watch for fans of offbeat genre experiments this Christmas. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.5/10. Holy crap, was this a chaotic, campy, and wildly inventive horror-comedy that transforms the comforting tradition of a crackling fireplace into a full-blown surrealist nightmare. What starts as an innocuous yule log feed unravels into a multi-layered story that’s part slasher, part supernatural thriller, and part absurdist comedy. The film centers on a couple and a group of podcasters who find themselves double-booked at a secluded cabin that quickly spirals into an unpredictable frenzy of blood and strange chaos. I wasn't familiar with the leads of this one but Andrea Laing playing Zoe and Justin Miles as Alex did just fine in being believable while still keeping a straight face during the insanity. Evil forces—including a murderous log (yes, really)—turn this cozy holiday setting into a battleground of bizarre mayhem. Clearly inspired by The Cabin in the Woods, the movie embraces its over-the-top premise with a knowingly campy tone, leaning into its absurdity while delivering enough gore to satisfy horror fans. It doesn’t aim to terrify but rather to entertain, and it succeeds by offering a rollercoaster of unexpected twists and a “kitchen sink” approach to horror tropes.

The film has fun with its limitations, turning what could have been a gimmick into a full-fledged experience. The roaming killer log is ridiculous in the best way, setting the tone for a story where almost anything feels possible. For those who appreciate horror with a playful side, this film is a blast. With its unique blend of humor, horror, and sheer audacity, this movie is a must-watch for fans of offbeat genre experiments. And with a sequel already available, it’s the perfect time to dive into this insane holiday horror universe.

This one is exclusive to MAX if you are interested.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/adult-swim-yule-log-2022

I was hesitant but this Xmas flick delivers a solid cast, a clever take on Christmas mythology, and an action-packed story. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.8/10. I am a bit surprised to say this flick delivers a high-octane holiday adventure that’s equal parts action and yuletide cheer. Combining an imaginative North Pole setting with globe-trotting thrills, this movie offers a fun, festive ride that’s perfect for the holiday season. The film’s world-building shines, presenting the North Pole as a sprawling Christmas complex brimming with advanced technology, magical elements, and festive charm. The special effects are top-notch, bringing the Christmas lore to life with a mix of dazzling visuals and creative storytelling. Dwayne Johnson is in his element as the tough-as-nails Head of Security, embracing his action-hero persona with charisma and the right amount of humor. J.K. Simmons delivers a standout performance as a stacked, battle-ready Santa Claus, proving that even Saint Nick can pack a punch. Kiernan Shipka’s Gryla is a compelling villain, balancing menace with a touch of dark holiday magic. Chris Evans drops the shield for this flick and convincingly plays a reluctant tracker who has to get off the naughty list to help save Christmas. Meanwhile, the Krampus character (Kristofer Hivju) is surprisingly well-developed, with a memorable introduction that adds depth to the film’s lore. The humor lands well, keeping the tone light-hearted even amidst the high-stakes action sequences. The movie doesn’t take itself too seriously, leaning into its popcorn-flick nature with playful energy. The action is well-choreographed, offering plenty of thrills to keep us engaged. While The Red One may not reach the status of a timeless Christmas classic, it’s undeniably entertaining and full of heart. It’s a holiday treat that’s perfect for a family movie night or a December escape. With its solid cast, clever take on Christmas mythology, and action-packed story, this is one gift worth unwrapping this holiday season.

This one is already on Prime Video if you aren't heading to the theater.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/red-one-2024

I know someone who will be very interested in this trailer. Anyone else looking forward to this continuing after the show ends? #jackmeatsflix

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uPzOyzsnmio

Very much a guilty pleasure for any Troma fans out there which I am proud to say includes me. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.6/10. Every film fanatic has been wondering what happened to Melvin the mop boy, Mark Torgl and here we have his return. Sure, I am pretty biased being a huge fan of all things Troma. HERE I am hanging out at Troma Studios with Lloyd Kaufman and The Toxic Avenger discussing where the Tromettes are hiding. Anyways, the movie LOL. "Melvin The Mopboy" transforms into Toxie, as he attends the Monster Convention circuit for the first time. Discover the convention world through Torgl's eyes, and learn a deep dark secret that has kept Torgl in hiding for 30 years. This is more or less a guilty pleasure for Troma fans, and I have been one ever since junior high when my uncle came home with a VHS of a movie called Toxic Avenger and after watching that absurd brilliance I have been hooked. I had fun with the movie and it appears all involved did as well, if for nothing else, the nostalgia.

You can find this on a few streamers and while you are at it, check out Troma

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/toxic-tutu-2017

Something blows this Christmas and it is this poor excuse for a horror flick set in, you guessed it, a cabin in the woods. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 2.6/10. This flick sets itself up as a classic “cabin in the woods” horror tale but quickly devolves into a cacophony of bickering, shaky camera work, and unconvincing supernatural menace. What could have been an eerie holiday horror instead feels like a slapped-together project with a deer skull as its creative centerpiece—and not much else. The premise of young friends trapped in a remote mountain cabin by a mysterious creature always has potential, but the execution fails at nearly every turn. The group dynamic, typically the lifeblood of such ensemble horror, is utterly joyless here. It’s not that the characters dislike each other—they hate each other. This relentless animosity drags the film down, making you wish the creature would show up just to break the monotony. When it finally does—50 minutes in!—it’s hard to muster any excitement. The scares are woefully ineffective. Shaking the camera and tossing in random skull imagery doesn’t make for tension, it makes for frustration. Add to that a barrage of fake screams and melodramatic music cues, and the atmosphere feels more like a parody of horror than the real deal. The creature design is ambiguous at best, laughable at worst. Was it a monster? A spirit? A metaphor for my dwindling patience? The low-budget nature of the production is painfully evident in the special effects, which range from uninspired to downright amateurish. The kills, a hallmark of any decent horror film, are forgettable and lack any creativity. Even the gore—an area where budget films can often shine with ingenuity—is underwhelming. What does stand out is the snowy setting, which is admittedly beautiful. The stark, wintry landscapes provide a fleeting visual charm, but it’s far from enough to save the film. The title sequence, arriving so late it feels like a cruel joke, might be the only moment that elicited genuine emotion: incredulity. Writer/director Dionne Copland appears to have hinged the film’s entire concept on the discovery of a deer skull, and it shows. There’s no depth, no nuance, and no payoff. This movie is a cold wind indeed—frigid, aimless, and it definitely BLOWS. While it just narrowly avoids landing in the #turkey category, it’s certainly a miss. If you’re looking for a holiday horror film, skip this one and go for something with a bit more substance or at least one that doesn’t mistake constant bickering and shaky cameras for actual scares.

Your choices for streaming this one are limited including a couple of freebies.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/cold-wind-blowing-2022

I was itching to see the finale to this trilogy and for fans of the anti-hero and his wisecracking symbiote, it’s a dance worth watching. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.5/10. The Venom franchise takes its final bow with The Last Dance, a high-stakes conclusion to Eddie Brock (Tom Hardy) and Venom's chaotic partnership. This installment, while not without its flaws, marks an improvement over its predecessor, delivering a bittersweet farewell that blends humor, action, and emotional stakes. The film finds Eddie and Venom on the run, hunted relentlessly by forces from both Earth and beyond. As the walls close in, the duo faces an impossible choice that pushes their bond to the breaking point. It’s a somber yet fitting end to their story, driven by a narrative that isn’t afraid to raise the stakes and embrace the inevitable. For fans of the comics, the introduction of Knull—who refers to himself as King in Black after the credits—is a highlight. His presence hints at an ambitious expansion of the storyline, with potential ripple effects that could tie into the broader Marvel Cinematic Universe. Having read the King in Black saga, I'm excited to see the seeds of that storyline planted here. Visually, these flix continue to impress. The symbiote effects remain top-notch, delivering chaotic, fluid action sequences that capture the essence of Venom's powers. Tom Hardy once again brings his A-game, both as Eddie Brock and the voice of Venom, balancing the film’s darker tones with laugh-out-loud humor. One standout moment is a joke referencing Hardy’s real-life status as a fan-favorite heartthrob, where Venom teases Eddie about past involvement in "sexiest man" contests. It’s self-aware humor like this that keeps the film grounded amid its darker themes. While the movie is a step up from the previous sequel, it still struggles with pacing and a somewhat overloaded plot. Knull’s arc, though intriguing, feels underdeveloped, leaving you wanting more. However, the chemistry between Eddie and Venom, the sharp humor, and the satisfying sense of closure make this a worthy finale. It delivers on its promise of a dramatic and entertaining send-off. It’s not perfect, but for fans of the anti-hero and his wisecracking symbiote, it’s a dance worth watching.

Currently, this one is in theaters and on a few streamers including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/venom-the-last-dance-2024

Cleaning up this Xmas horror playlist and I was treated to another slasher that has no memorable kills, subpar acting, and a lackluster story. Enjoy LOL. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.3/10. The flick opens with a promisingly dark start seeing a young Christina witness the horrifying murder of her family at the hands of Sammy the Elf. Decades later, the vengeful elf returns to punish the naughty in a small Midwest town, and Christina (Kayla Kelly) must confront her traumatic past to protect her daughter. Unfortunately, the execution leaves much to be desired. First, let’s address the acting—or lack thereof. The performances suggest the cast skipped acting school entirely, with line delivery ranging from wooden to overly exaggerated. The self-aware quip, "We're not going to become another low-budget horror movie cliché," only serves to highlight the irony, as the film fully embraces every cliché imaginable. Technical issues further plague the film. Inconsistent sound mixing makes some scenes difficult to hear, and the lack of practical effects or creativity in the kills makes the horror elements fall flat. For a movie with a killer elf premise, you’d expect at least some fun or inventive gore, but instead, we’re treated to uninspired deaths that fail to stand out in the crowded slasher subgenre. Toward the film’s drawn-out conclusion, it makes a half-hearted attempt at storytelling, introducing a melodramatic twist that feels forced and unearned. The pacing drags, and the attempt to infuse depth and emotion falters due to the cast's limited acting chops. There’s one glimmer of entertainment that I though was a humorous moment from the “token Black guy” character, who subverts a horror trope to his advantage with a well-timed joke. It’s a fleeting instance of wit in an otherwise humorless and uninspired script. Overall, the movie is too long, too derivative, and too low-quality to make any lasting impression. With no memorable kills, subpar acting, and a lackluster story, it fails to deliver even the guilty pleasures of a low-budget holiday slasher. If you’re looking for Christmas horror, this one should stay off your wishlist.

Amazon has this flick for rent and a few freebies do as well.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/he-knows-2022

Worth a watch if you’re a fan of indie slashers that take place during Christmas but temper your expectations. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4,9/10. I'll admit, the title sold me right away. With its promise of holiday horror, this flicks aims to blend slasher thrills with a modern social twist, taking us on a blood-soaked sleigh ride into the conservative hometown of trans true-crime podcaster, Lola (Jeremy Moineau). A masked Santa killer pays grisly homage to a town legend, The Toymaker, and Lola’s own connection to these murders puts her in the killer’s sights. Unfortunately, while the setup had potential, the film ultimately delivers a mixed bag. The character of Lola is compelling on paper—a trans woman returning to her judgmental hometown, armed with her resilience and investigative skills—but the execution leaves something to be desired. Flashbacks of her pre-transition struggles are effectively brutal, but the tonal shift post-transition feels jarring, as everyone suddenly treats her like she’s untouchable. This inconsistency undercuts the emotional depth the character could have brought. The plot leans heavily on the classic “podcaster solves the crime” trope, with local police inexplicably granting Lola unfettered access to confidential case details. While this might appeal to podcast enthusiasts who dream of cracking cold cases, it feels far-fetched and undermines the story’s credibility. The mystery starts off decently, weaving together some passable twists, but the finale takes a turn for the absurd, resolving everything in a way that feels more convenient than clever. Performance-wise, Moineau does a respectable job as Lola, adding layers of vulnerability and strength to a script that doesn’t always do her justice. Unfortunately, the rest of the cast feels largely forgettable, serving more as filler than fleshed-out characters. The direction by Alice Maio Mackay is a standout, though. Mackay’s eye for composition and her ability to create striking visuals hint at a promising future in horror. While the kill scenes suffer from budget constraints and overly ambitious attempts at being “artsy” (looking at you, Suspiria), there’s enough flair here to suggest that Mackay could deliver something truly special with a bigger budget or a more fleshed out script. At 69 minutes, themovie is short enough that it doesn’t overstay its welcome. While it stumbles in its storytelling and lacks the resources to fully capitalize on its premise, there’s a scrappy charm to its effort. If you’re in the mood for a quick holiday horror flick with some decent visuals and don’t mind a few narrative missteps, you could do worse.

You have a few streaming choices aside from Amazon including freebies.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/carnage-for-christmas-2024

I always enjoy a movie that has you convinced you know what is going on and then it takes a right turn into something else. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.3/10. I caught this one on Chiller years ago and really enjoyed it but now I need to see if it was as good as my memory is telling me it was. The answer is a very sneaky YES. This flick sees the luck of a well-known jewel thief, Ritchie Donovan (Stephen Dorff) having just run out. Ritchie is the only survivor of a heist that went terribly wrong having been forced to take the rap he is then sent to Russia. When in the country Ritchie is sent to steal a priceless, much sought-after antique cross that is locked away in a safe on the penthouse floor of an old, creepy Moscow building. Now with time running out something goes terribly wrong and Ritchie and his Russian crew have to take hostages and make a stand on the abandoned thirteenth floor of the building. Expect to see some serial killers, insane hostages, double-crossing psycho Russian hardmen and that is the tame stuff. If you have read my reviews, you know I point out that Dorff has a tendency to pop up in movies that start out as one thing and then morph into something totally different. This is one of those flix. I don't want to spoil anything but this is a well made horror comedy that is only brought down by a lack of overall polish and maybe a bit more financial backing. Kit Ryan does a fabulous job bringing all these ideas together into a single film. I am not sure why but this was nearly the extent of his directing resume although I do see he has an upcoming series in the works. If you get the chance, I suggest checking it out for a change-of-pace type of movie.

There are several streaming options all with the same price so take your pick.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/botched-2007

Fans of the 1987 cult classic beware, while this remake does bring us an oozing splatterfest, it misses the FUN aspect. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.5/10. Out of nowhere, the 2024 remake of Street Trash arrived, stirring up feelings of both anticipation and nostalgia. As a huge fan of the original 1987 cult classic, which exuded Troma flair without actually being a Troma production, I had high hopes for this reimagining. The premise remains similar: a group of homeless misfits fights for survival against a sinister plot to exterminate every homeless person in the city. However, the execution in this version leaves much to be desired. One positive aspect is the involvement of Bloody Disgusting in the production, a move that guaranteed some quality gore and practical effects. Indeed, the practical effects here are commendable, providing an old-school charm that horror fans can appreciate. However, the problem lies in the film's overall tone and delivery. The original Street Trash was a chaotic and spontaneous rollercoaster of absurd comedy and over-the-top gore, flowing naturally in a way that felt both anarchic and entertaining. In contrast, Ryan Kruger’s remake struggles to capture that same magic. The comedy and gore, while present, feel overly calculated and forced. It’s as if the film is constantly trying to prove itself rather than letting its absurdity and grotesque elements unfold organically. Kruger’s effort to both emulate and change the original simultaneously results in a tonal mishmash that doesn’t quite hit the mark. Fans of the original will notice attempts to recreate iconic moments and vibes, but they lack the carefree, anarchic energy that made the 1987 version so memorable. Despite its flaws, this rehash has its moments, especially for fans who enjoy practical effects and grimy, gross-out horror. However, it ultimately pales in comparison to the chaotic brilliance of the original.

Only Amazon and Apple to (b)rent and something called Hoopla for free. Trailer

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/street-trash-2024

I have been neglecting #jackmeatstv so here is a dark, captivating, and expertly acted series that fans of The Batman won’t want to miss.

My quick rating - 8.2/10. Colin Farrell delivers a phenomenal performance as Oz Cobb, a.k.a. The Penguin, in this gripping and gritty Gotham crime saga. Picking up where The Batman (2022 left off, this first season focuses on Oz's ruthless rise to power as he attempts to seize control of Gotham's criminal underworld. What sets this show apart is its ability to craft a captivating story about an unapologetic scumbag, and yet you can’t help but root for him to succeed—at least, I was. Farrell brings such nuance to the role, perfectly balancing Penguin's dishonesty, brutality, and surprising charm. He’s a deeply flawed anti-hero who commands every scene. The supporting cast also shines, especially Rhenzy Feliz as Victor, Penguin's apprentice. Victor’s character is so well-designed and believable that he becomes an essential anchor to Oz's story, highlighting the complexities of loyalty, ambition, and mentorship in a cutthroat world. The writing and directing crew deserve major praise for their ability to pull viewers into Gotham's murky underbelly. The dialogue is sharp, the pacing is tight, and the tone stays true to the dark, noir-inspired aesthetic of The Batman. Every scene feels purposeful, whether it’s showcasing Penguin’s cunning schemes or fleshing out the tension between power players in the city. The Penguin is a masterclass in character-driven storytelling, anchored by phenomenal acting and razor-sharp writing. Farrell proves once again that he can completely disappear into a role, making you cheer for the villain as he claws his way to the top. If this is just the beginning of Oz Cobb’s reign, I can’t wait to see what’s next for Gotham’s underworld.

Check Justwatch for the various ways to check this MAX original.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/the-penguin-season-1-2024

With this lump of coal, you get bad acting, a threadbare story, and hit-or-miss effects that won't even satisfy as a guilty pleasure. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.4/10. I popped this flick on and watched as it attempted to blend Christmas cheer with sinister scares, but what I got was more a lump of coal than festive fright. The setup is standard haunted-house fare: a family moves into a spooky old mansion to renovate it, only to stumble upon a mysterious toy chest that unleashes chaos. While this premise could have led to an enjoyable holiday horror romp, the execution falls painfully short. Let’s start with the toys themselves. The weird CGI-stop-motion hybrid effects are a mixed bag. Occasionally, the animation evokes an unsettling, otherworldly vibe reminiscent of vintage holiday specials—but for every effective moment, there are several where the toys look downright goofy, undercutting any sense of tension or fear. I can honestly say the toy effects from the original 1989 Puppet Master looked more convincing. The acting doesn’t help matters. Across the board, performances are flat and unconvincing, making it difficult to care about the characters or their inevitable demise. Zoe and Franklin, the children at the heart of the story, lack charm, while the adults are bland and forgettable. As for the plot—well, calling it “non-existent” might be generous. The movie stumbles through its runtime with a series of disconnected events, with no meaningful buildup or payoff. The “dark past” of the mansion and the toys’ malevolent origins are barely explored, leaving the story feeling hollow. The filmmakers seem more interested in piling on random carnage than crafting a compelling story. The body count does rise as promised, but the lackluster kills and absence of suspense make the carnage feel perfunctory. Even the holiday setting, which should add some ironic charm to the horror, doesn't help. In the end, the film is a forgettable misfire that squanders its creepy concept and festive setting. With bad acting, a threadbare story, and hit-or-miss effects, it’s hard to recommend this film—even as a guilty pleasure. If you’re craving holiday horror, there are far better options out there.

Big surprise, Amazon along with a couple of other streamers have this one.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/toys-of-terror-2020

I am catching up on "pending" reviews for the transition OFF WIX, so you may get a few extra reviews including this bland horror flick. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3,3/10. I felt like this flick was just teasing me with potential, but the execution leaves much to be desired. A man returns to his family’s vacation home, the site of a horrific event during his 10th birthday, in hopes of uncovering the truth behind his repressed memories. Sadly, the story unravels under poor acting, chaotic editing, and a narrative that fails to deliver coherent thrills or chills. The use of a red balloon as a recurring image feels like an attempt to borrow from IT, but any association with Stephen King's masterpiece ends there. Where IT was haunting and atmospheric, this flounders in mediocrity. The acting lacks conviction, making it difficult to connect with the characters or care about their fate. The editing is especially jarring, with scenes feeling disjointed, sometimes as if they were shuffled out of order and I cannot let the makers of this film blame the budget for such laziness. This not only disrupts the flow of the story but also adds to the confusion about who—or what—the antagonist is supposed to be. By the end, the movie will leave you scratching your head (assuming you bother with this one). Are we meant to fear the balloon, or the evil characters sporadically introduced? The lack of clarity and tension makes for a frustrating watch. It’s clear that humor wasn’t intended, but the lack of serious scares and dramatic weight makes it unintentionally laughable at times. It could have been a compelling psychological horror if its elements were handled with more skill. Unfortunately, it feels like a scattered collection of ideas that never quite come together. Unless you’re in the mood for a lesson in how not to structure a horror film, this one is better left floating away.

Amazon or Tubi if you still feel the need to see this flick.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/the-luring-2018

This holiday flick is worth a watch for die-hard John Woo fans or action enthusiasts but might miss the mark due to lack of dialogue. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.5/10. From the legendary John Woo, this flick delivers a gritty revenge tale infused with the director's trademark action sequences but falls short of the high bar set by Woo's earlier works. This dialogue-free film follows Brian (Joel Kinnaman), a grieving father who witnesses his young son’s tragic death during a gang's Christmas Eve shootout. Left voiceless by a wound sustained in the crossfire, Brian embarks on a relentless journey of vengeance, transforming himself into a weapon of retribution. The concept of a nearly wordless narrative is intriguing, but in execution, it feels more like a distraction than a storytelling innovation. While Kinnaman’s physical performance effectively conveys grief and rage, the absence of dialogue feels contrived. It’s understandable for Brian, whose injury renders him mute, but the silence from the rest of the cast often feels unnatural, pulling the viewer out of an otherwise engaging story. That said, the film delivers where John Woo excels: the action. The set pieces are visceral, thrilling, and meticulously choreographed, showcasing Woo’s signature style of balletic violence. The gunfights are as dynamic as ever, with a kinetic energy that keeps you glued to the screen. However, even these standout moments can’t fully compensate for a story that feels overly simplistic and occasionally forced. On the emotional side, this movie does manage to convey the depth of Brian’s grief and determination, even without dialogue. The story effectively captures the raw, singular focus of a parent bent on justice. Yet, the lack of meaningful interactions or supporting character arcs leaves the film feeling one-dimensional, with its emotional beats not hitting as hard as they could. As a Woo film, Silent Night has all the expected flair, but it’s hard not to compare it to his previous masterpieces. While the movie tries to redefine action storytelling with its dialogue-free approach, it doesn’t reach the heights of classics like Hard Boiled or Face/Off. The novelty of the silence is overshadowed by the missed opportunity to fully capitalize on the talent involved, especially with Kinnaman’s strong performance and Woo’s legendary direction. In the end, this film is an interesting experiment that showcases flashes of brilliance but doesn’t quite live up to the lofty expectations set by its creator’s legacy. Worth a watch for die-hard John Woo fans or action enthusiasts, which I fit into both categories, but for everyone, it may not quite hit the same level.

Amazon and several other streamers have this one for you to check out for the holidays.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/silent-night-2023

I ran across this well-acted thriller that should keep you engaged from start to finish with an interesting situation. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.2/10. I ran across a tense and minimalist thriller that thrives on its simplicity, crafting a gripping story around a chilling premise. Set against the eerie isolation of a secluded forest, the film follows a grieving woman who becomes the target of a sadistic killer. After being injected with a paralytic drug, she must fight for survival as her body gradually betrays her. The film’s strength lies in its ability to create tension and sustain it throughout. The isolated setting amplifies the feeling of vulnerability, making every moment feel like a desperate struggle. The central cat-and-mouse dynamic between the protagonist and the killer is the heart of the story, and it’s executed with precision by directors Adam Schindler and Brian Netto. Both leads deliver compelling performances. Iris’s fight for survival is portrayed with raw intensity by Kelsey Asbille, capturing the physical and emotional toll of her ordeal. Meanwhile, the killer (Finn Wittrock) exudes a quiet menace, making every interaction between them fraught with danger. Their performances elevate what could have been a straightforward survival story into something much more engaging. The minimalist approach to storytelling works in the film’s favor. There are no unnecessary subplots or convoluted twists; instead, the focus remains squarely on the escalating tension and the protagonist’s will to survive. While this simplicity may leave you wanting more depth or backstory, it allows the film to fully explore its premise and maximize the impact of its core conflict. This movie doesn’t rely on flashy effects or elaborate set pieces. Instead, it leans into the physicality of the situation and the performances of its leads. This stripped-down approach makes the stakes feel immediate and real, even if the story doesn’t break new ground. Overall, this delivers a taut, well-acted thriller that kept me engaged from start to finish. While it may not reinvent the genre, it succeeds in creating an intense and memorable survival story that’s worth a watch for fans of minimalist horror and suspense.

You'll have to check in with Netflix for this one right now.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/don-t-move-2024

I got wrapped up but I wanted to make sure and share this trailer with you all. If you haven't seen the first two (days and weeks), make sure to add them to your watchlist. #jackmeatsflix

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcvLKldPM08&pp=ygUWMjggeWVhcnMgbGF0ZXIgdHJhaWxlcg%3D%3D

Amateurish filmmaking and lack of cohesive vision ensure this movie will remain in the bargain bin of holiday horror. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.2/10. Another entry from the Bloody Disgusting brand, this flick attempts to merge holiday cheer with classic horror but ends up delivering a lump of coal instead. The film begins with an intriguing premise: Max Causey, at six years old, accidentally kills Santa Claus. Fast forward 12 years, and Max decides to resurrect the jolly old soul—only to unwittingly unleash a bloodthirsty monster on his friend’s Christmas party. The potential for a campy horror-comedy is there, but it’s squandered by amateur execution and missed opportunities. The Frankenstein-inspired setup could have been a playground for clever satire or inventive scares, yet what unfolds feels more like a haphazard student project than a polished production. One of the most glaring issues is the acting. The cast appears to be having a blast making the movie—so much so that their grins and giggles seep into scenes where they’re entirely inappropriate. Whether this is a case of bad editing or lack of direction, it pulls viewers out of the story at every turn. The practical effects are subpar, with little effort to make the gore or kills impactful. A single attempt at digital effects—a severed head—proves even worse, standing out as a glaring eyesore that pales in comparison to what practical effects could have achieved. Even the titular monster, a resurrected and murderous Santa, is poorly executed. With a goofy grin plastered across his face, he fails to evoke any sense of dread or menace. Instead of the creepy unease of a film like Smile, this feels more like a blooper reel that accidentally made the final cut. While the opening scene shows a glimmer of potential, it quickly evaporates as the story tumbles downhill. There’s a palpable sense of “what could have been,” but the amateurish filmmaking and lack of cohesive vision ensure this movie will remain in the bargain bin of holiday horror. If you’re in the mood for festive frights, there are better options. This one may get a laugh or two if viewed ironically with friends, but for most, it’s a miss. Whether it was released in 2018, 2023, or 2024, it’s clear Santastein fails to bring the magic—or the terror—of Christmas to life.

In case you can't find anything better to watch, plenty of freebies and Amazon have it.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/santastein-2023

The Appalachian setting is a nice touch for this entry in the Hellboy franchise but the lack of Ron Perlman is a deal breaker. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.7/10. This sequel attempts to reignite the beloved franchise by delving into the darker, folklore-heavy corners of the Hellboy universe. Set in the 1950s Appalachian wilderness, the story finds Hellboy and a rookie BPRD agent battling a coven of witches and their enigmatic leader, the Crooked Man—a figure with ties to Hellboy’s infernal lineage. While the film does succeed in creating a moody, atmospheric setting that feels ripped from a gothic horror comic, it struggles to live up to the franchise’s legacy. The absence of Ron Perlman as Hellboy is deeply felt. His replacement Jack Kesy, though capable, lacks the commanding presence and wit that Perlman brought to the role, leaving the film feeling somewhat hollow. The Crooked Man (Martin Bassindale) as a villain is underwhelming, both in concept and execution. Rather than being a terrifying, layered antagonist, he feels like a watered-down caricature, devoid of the menace needed to carry the film. The action scenes provide some sparks of excitement, but they are few and far between, making it difficult to stay engaged. The film’s most significant shortcoming is its lack of the bite and boldness that made earlier entries in the franchise so memorable. Gone are the robust characters, rich lore, and sharp humor that defined the series. Instead, what remains is a diluted attempt at supernatural horror that leans heavily on its visual style but fails to deliver in terms of story or character depth. It isn’t a total misfire—its Appalachian setting and folklore-inspired premise had potential, and there are moments that briefly capture the eerie magic of its source material. However, the uninspired villain, uneven pacing, and lack of a compelling Hellboy ultimately leave it feeling like a shadow of what it could have been.

There are a few streamers renting this one including Amazon.

https://jackmeat.wixsite.com/jackmeat/post/hellboy-the-crooked-man-2024