Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan: Ghost War (2026) | Ghost War moves fast, explains everything twice, and feels like a paint-by-numbers streaming spy assignment. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.3/10. If there is one thing Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan: Ghost War wants you to know immediately, it is that absolutely nobody in this universe can simply have a quiet day at work. The movie opens exactly how you would expect a streaming-era espionage thriller to open. People yelling into earpieces, guns firing, computers doing mysterious “important hacking things,” and a covert team trying to digitally steal something so classified the audience is apparently not trusted to understand it yet. Naturally, everything goes sideways.

Then we are whisked away to New York City where Jack Ryan (John Krasinski) is attempting that mythical concept known as having a normal life. He is out on a peaceful jog, minding his own business, trying very hard not to save the world for five whole minutes. Unfortunately for Jack, espionage movies have the same respect for retirement as horror movies do for common sense. Before long, James Greer (Wendell Pierce) shows up for what is essentially “Hey buddy, quick favor…” The kind of favor that inevitably ends with international conspiracies, gunfire, and several passport stamps.

To be fair, Ghost War does have moments where it almost remembers what made the Jack Ryan series work so well. Partnering Jack with MI6 officer Emma Marlowe (Sienna Miller) gives the film some solid chemistry, while Greer and Mike November (Michael Kelly) remain welcome additions. The globe-trotting scenery also deserves credit because if the script is going to drag us through another secret rogue black-ops conspiracy, at least it has the decency to provide nice travel footage along the way. Even if it felt like a travel advertisement for Dubai at times.

The problem is that Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan: Ghost War explains absolutely everything far too early and far too directly. A good espionage thriller thrives on tension, paranoia, and restraint. Fear, loyalty, guilt, and uncertainty should simmer beneath the surface while characters carefully navigate impossible situations. Here, the movie feels terrified that viewers might become confused for seventeen seconds, so it overexplains itself into submission.

What remains is a polished but painfully formulaic streaming spy thriller that checks boxes instead of creating suspense. The final extended gun battle is entertaining enough, but somehow never feels particularly tense. Things explode, bullets fly, people yell tactical instructions, and yet it never quite earns the investment needed to make any of it matter.

Honestly, Ghost War feels like it was written by an algorithm fed every “CIA accidentally causes terrorism” plotline from the last twenty years and instructed to make it shiny. Compare this to the first season of Jack Ryan, which actually understood espionage storytelling. That show gave us layered characters, conversations dripping with tension, emotional stakes, and consequences that mattered. You cared about Jack, Greer, and even the villains because they felt human.

Here? Everyone mostly feels like they were assembled in a streaming-content factory where the mission briefing included the words: “Make it loud, expensive, and vaguely political.”

Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan: Ghost War (2026)

Tom Clancy’s Jack Ryan: Ghost War is watchable enough if you simply want spies running through airports and tactical teams kicking doors in, but compared to the show, this mission feels very much compromised.

https://jackmeat.com/tom-clancys-jack-ryan-ghost-war-2026/

Bad Voodoo (2026) | The biggest twist in Bad Voodoo was realizing IMDb reviews accidentally belonged to a completely different movie. Funny stuff. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 3.2/10. Bad Voodoo starts off in a way that immediately makes you think, “Alright, maybe this thing is going somewhere weird.” Some girls are chatting in a car when suddenly, bam, one screams, “Dad!” before getting absolutely obliterated by a car. It is abrupt enough to wake you up if you happen to be checking your phone already. From there, we cut to Abigail sitting in a field with what looks suspiciously like a cult gathering while candle-lighting rituals and chanting pop up like the movie is desperately trying to say, “Trust us, spooky things are happening.”

Back at Abigail’s house, her brother swings by to warn her about a prison break nearby, because apparently the local neighborhood updates include escaped convicts now. Abigail (Cristina Moody) brushes it off, naturally, which of course means she is immediately abducted by the very inmates he warned her about. Horror movies and listening to common sense continue their lifelong feud.

The biggest hurdle with Bad Voodoo is that it feels like several unfinished movie ideas got tossed into a blender and nobody checked if the lid was on. There is a home invasion setup here that honestly could have worked. Add some voodoo magic, make the writing tighter, and perhaps there is a good story lurking within. But no, the film doesn’t have any sense of direction and changes its motives according to which scene you’re watching, almost as if they were still in the process of scripting it during their lunch break.

The sound mix certainly does not help. Dialogue is often so quiet that you may find yourself leaning toward the TV like you are trying to overhear gossip from the neighbors. Unfortunately, what you eventually hear is acting that ranges from stiff to aggressively wooden. The standout performance comes from the Voodoo Priest, played by Jimmy C. Jules, though “standout” might be generous. His overacting somehow circles around from entertaining to irritating, becoming the equivalent of somebody yelling directly into your ear at a party.

What really cracked me up was the total lack of urgency from characters who are supposedly in danger. Tied-up captives casually chatting like they are waiting at a bus stop instead of trying to escape, and dark supernatural forces gave Bad Voodoo an accidental comedy streak stronger than its horror.

The supernatural voodoo side of things ends up feeling half-baked, and whatever twist the movie thinks it is dropping lands with all the surprise of seeing rain clouds before a storm. If it shocks you, fair enough, but chances are you saw it coming from a mile away.

The kills are weak, the scares are basically nonexistent, and somehow the mid-credit sequel tease feels more thought out than the movie you just watched. I genuinely wondered how Bad Voodoo was hovering near a 5 on IMDb until I checked the reviews and discovered half of them appear to be for an entirely different movie. Unless “watching a man alone in a tiny capsule communicating with a ground team through crackling audio” suddenly became voodoo horror, IMDb may need a wellness check on this one. Read those reviews with caution because apparently the editors are on a very extended holiday.

Bad Voodoo (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/bad-voodoo-2026/

Thrash (2026) | Thrash basically asks, “What if surviving a Category 5 hurricane wasn’t stressful enough?” Enter the sharks. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.3/10. If natural disasters already weren’t terrifying enough, Thrash arrives to remind us that flooding your entire coastal town is apparently not stressful enough unless somebody also adds sharks to the equation. Because when a Category 5 hurricane is tearing buildings apart, obviously, the logical next step is, “You know what this situation needs? Teeth.”

To the movie’s credit, Thrash doesn’t waste time pretending the storm came out of nowhere. Everyone is preparing from the beginning, boarding windows and scrambling to get ready for what looks like a very bad few days ahead. There is something oddly refreshing about characters actually paying attention to weather warnings for once instead of standing outside saying, “Kinda windy today.”

And when that storm finally hits? It hits hard. The hurricane itself genuinely looks impressive, with the flooding delivering some surprisingly convincing destruction for what absolutely carries that charming B-budget disaster movie energy. Streets turn into rivers, buildings take a beating, and the whole thing has that “humanity had a good run” kind of atmosphere.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, the floodwaters also bring in some very unwelcome new neighbours: sharks. Lots of sharks. Suddenly, surviving a hurricane becomes step one, and not becoming dinner becomes step two.

The story follows a handful of desperate survivors trying to navigate the chaos. Lisa (Phoebe Dynevor) is heavily pregnant, because apparently, surviving a hurricane wasn’t stressful enough on its own. Dakota (Whitney Peak) struggles with panic issues, which honestly feels like the most relatable response possible considering the circumstances. Meanwhile, there are three foster kids stuck with foster parents who might genuinely qualify for Worst Guardians of the Year, complete with accents that occasionally sound like they wandered in from entirely different movies. Then there is Djimon Hounsou showing up as Dakota’s doctor uncle, heading toward disaster with a film crew because apparently some people see “catastrophic shark flood” and think, “Fantastic documentary opportunity.”

Now, does Thrash make logical sense all the time? Absolutely not. Not even remotely. Then there are scenes where people are doing things that might have you shouting at the screen about survival instincts, and for a moment, you may find yourself thinking that perhaps common sense drowned off in the flood with everyone’s furniture. However, to be honest, it seems like the kind of film where struggling against the idiocy is counterproductive.

Thankfully, the sharks themselves actually look pretty solid. No terrifying early-2000s CGI disasters swimming around here. The creatures feel threatening enough, even if the movie is surprisingly restrained when it comes to body count and gore. Considering sharks are casually living in the town at this point, I expected significantly more screaming and considerably fewer surviving extras.

In the end, Thrash works best as a casual streaming watch for creature-feature fans. It has decent atmosphere, effective sharks, and an entertaining enough disaster setup, but never quite rises above mediocrity. The potential is there, but thinner character work and uneven storytelling stop it from leaving much of an impression. Either way, if "hurricane plus sharks" appeals to you, there are certainly worse movies for your "ridiculous" Friday night viewing.

Thrash (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/thrash-2026/

Normal (2026) | Bob Odenkirk wanders into a quiet little town called Normal and immediately discovers absolutely nothing is normal there. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.3/10. Normal opens in the last place I expected a movie called Normal to begin. Osaka, Japan. Because apparently the best way to kick off a neo-Western thriller set in snowy Minnesota is with a Japanese version of “Paranoid,” a brutal loyalty test, and the kind of pinky-removal situation that makes you instinctively hide your own hand behind your back. Things escalate quickly too. Refuse the loyalty test? Off comes your head. Casual stuff. Before long, someone ships two very unlucky guys off to the tiny town of Normal, Minnesota, where things definitely do not plan to stay normal.

Enter Bob Odenkirk as Ulysses. He's a substitute sheriff temporarily escaping some personal & professional baggage. If there is one thing Odenkirk does exceptionally well these days, it is playing exhausted men who look like they desperately need a nap. Yet still fully capable of ruining your day. Through amusing narration and some genuinely funny small-town interactions, Ulysses settles into Normal, meeting locals, including the Mayor, played by Henry Winkler. Whenever the Fonz, er...Winkler shows up in something, there is an immediate boost, even if the movie surrounding him is quietly threatening to spiral into complete chaos.

The town itself feels oddly cozy at first. Snow-covered streets, quiet routines, everyone seemingly knowing each other. As someone who misses snowy weather, Normal absolutely scratches that itch with its chilly atmosphere. It looks cold enough that I practically wanted to throw on another blanket while watching.

Then comes the bank robbery. Except in a tiny town like this, a robbery feels less like an inconvenience and more like the apocalypse arriving fifteen years early. Ulysses walks in, hoping to calm things down, and from there… yeah, I am deliberately keeping things vague because where Normal goes is far more entertaining if you discover it yourself. This is one of those films where every reveal lands better without spoilers, and trust me, some of them are gloriously weird.

Director Ben Wheatley continues his tradition of making films that seem mildly offended if you expect comfort or straightforward answers. Normal is strange, unsettling, and intentionally awkward in all the right ways. The story doesn’t hold your hand, and honestly, it feels like Wheatley standing in the corner saying, “Figure it out, mate.” Somehow, that works here. The off-balance tone gives the movie personality, even if it occasionally leaves you blinking at the screen wondering if you accidentally missed ten minutes.

There is also some solid action mixed throughout, including moments of accidental violence that caught me completely off guard and genuinely made me laugh. The movie balances tension and absurdity surprisingly well without tipping fully into parody.

Inevitably, Normal will get compared to Odenkirk’s recent Nobody films, and I’d personally put it around the level of Nobody 2. Not quite reaching the heights of the first Nobody, but still a fun, violent ride with enough unpredictability to keep things interesting. Outside of Odenkirk, don’t get too attached to anybody either. This movie makes it very clear that survival is more of a suggestion than a guarantee.

If you’re a fan of Odenkirk, strange action thrillers, or movies that enjoy keeping you slightly uncomfortable while occasionally making you laugh at accidental deaths, Normal will probably be worth checking out. Just don’t expect anything remotely…well, normal.

Normal (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/normal-2026/

Dark Floors (2008) | I had to check out this Finnish horror flick from the band Lordi, winners of Eurovision in 2006. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.1/10. I went into Dark Floors knowing nothing about it being a Lordi film. That being said, I am glad to have found this review from someone named "flamewall" located in Finland (the movie is Finnish).

Here is their review: "I got to say that I went to see this movie with low expectations. I didn't believe that a Lordi movie could be good because I actually couldn't imagine it as a whole. Though, after I saw the movie, I was amazed at how well the writers and the director pulled it off. It is often said that horror is the most delicate type of movie because there is only a slight difference between scary and ridiculous. but this doesn't concern Dark Floors because it is not (at least in my mind) a full-blooded horror movie. The movie has many horror elements but doesn't still come off as horror-ish. That doesn't make it bad it just means that you can't go into the theater wishing that you will be scared out of your nickers. The visual and audio feel of the movie was excellent, and there is nothing anyone can say about that. The plot did leave an annoying amount of plot holes, the ending didn't really clear any of them up, and the viewer was just left to guess what the plot was all about. Still, it didn't bother half as much as the under-use of the Lordi band members. I have never liked Lordi and never listened to them but while watching this movie I became interested in the different monsters they play. Sadly, the plot did hardly anything at all to use the unique backgrounds and looks of the different ghoul parts from the different superpowers they all demonstrated. What I am saying is that I would have liked this movie to be more about the monsters than the victims... really who gave a goddamn thing about what happened to the all-knowing copper or the businessman type. The only character I got even a bit curious was the weird hobo with superpowers and a weird telepathic relationship with the girl but he is never explained in any way(a big mistake). In retrospect, I think they could have done much better, but I also think there is a lot of good in this film, and I hope it will be a financial success. There is just one thing Finns can't tolerate: a successful Finnish movie if it is not a drama." (That review was heavily fixed by Grammarly in case you look it up)

My take on the movie as a whole is an interesting mix of “monsters”, ghosts, and zombies (updated again 9/18/23). This flick does have some decent practical effects. Now, at least you can say you’ve now seen a Finnish horror film (The most expensive movie ever made in Finland at the time), even if it is pretty damn nonsensical. The obstacles the characters would overcome were completely uneven, with some way too easy to defeat threats. Director Pete Riski never tells us why the mask-wearing Vikings are so angry, and the writers left way too many plot holes and unanswered questions to be rated any higher than I gave it. I assume many will go far lower due to the plot being all over the place with no resolution. The atmosphere and overall ambiance of the flick are what carry it through. Scenes are well put together, even if the locations can be confusing. In case you are wondering, in 2006, Lordi won Eurovision partially due to the shock value of walking on stage dressed up like the monsters that appear in this movie. Video here.

Apparently, I reviewed this years ago as well LOL (6/14/14): Movie review: "Dark Floors" Well, Lordi made their way onto the screen (before looking that up, I wasn't familiar). The movie has tons of atmosphere, some of which is creepy just by being so bizarre and empty. The actors (winking at you, little girl) were good. The pacing was done well, and the story itself led to a nice WTF at the end. Kills were slightly repetitive. Don't expect to understand this movie, so sit back and enjoy. Oh, the ghost effects were good, btw.

Dark Floors (2008)

https://jackmeat.com/dark-floors-2008/

Lee Cronin's The Mummy (2026) | The Mummy felt like Evil Dead, and The Exorcist had a cursed little horror baby wrapped in bandages. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.5/10. Lee Cronin’s The Mummy feels he tossed his memories of The Exorcist into an Egyptian tomb, sprinkled in what he learned making Evil Dead Rise, and said, “You know what this needs? More nightmare children.” Surprisingly, that recipe works pretty well, even if it occasionally forgets to fully crank the chaos dial.

The movie gets moving fast. We open with a happy family singing in the car, which in horror terms is basically a giant flashing sign that says, “Enjoy this while it lasts.” Mom already looks one chorus away from losing her patience, but things take a turn when the family gets home and finds their pet bird mysteriously dead in its cage. Because apparently cursed family drama likes to arrive early.

From there, The Mummy starts layering in creepy family business best left for audiences to discover. Let’s just say if creepy basements already make you uncomfortable, this movie may have you reconsidering ever walking downstairs again. Most people store old furniture or Christmas decorations. This place feels like someone casually hid a sarcophagus downstairs and hoped nobody would ask questions.

Things escalate when young Katie (Emily Mitchell) encounters the not-so-friendly neighborhood “magician” next door. She hands Katie a nectarine, which turns into a wonderfully unsettling moment with a bug popping out and heading straight into Katie’s mouth. That scene should have you eyeballing every piece of fruit sitting in that bowl on your kitchen counter.

Soon after, Charlie (Jack Reynor) discovers Katie has vanished, leading to a frantic chase through the streets of Cairo as a sandstorm swallows the city whole. Then comes the gut punch. An eight-year jump forward shows the family trying to move on in Albuquerque, New Mexico, now with a younger daughter while carrying the weight of what happened.

Of course, horror movies love reopening old wounds. After a mysterious plane crash in Egypt uncovers an ancient coffin, investigators find a mummified girl inside. And unless this is your first horror flick, you already know it is Katie (Natalie Grace).

This is where The Mummy becomes properly unsettling. Katie’s makeup is deeply disturbing, from the cracked skin to the teeth and especially those horrifying fingernails. The sound design deserves credit, too. That constant teeth chattering? Absolutely not. Straight-up skin-crawling material. Cronin clearly learned a few tricks from Evil Dead Rise, bringing over the same nasty energy of possessed people saying awful things at maximum taunting levels.

The kids are, without a doubt, the main stars, and the special effects certainly add to the fright more than the flashy CGI effects. In fact, this reimagining feels far less like a traditional mummy story and more like an Evil Dead cousin wearing ancient wrappings for Halloween.

Still, Lee Cronin’s The Mummy never quite goes as hard as it feels like it wants to. Several scenes tease full horror insanity before easing off the gas, especially an open-casket moment that feels like it stopped just short of legendary gross-out status. The movie also runs a bit too long and lands one good ending before oddly deciding it needs another.

Even with those flaws, Lee Cronin delivers a creepy, brutal horror mashup that works more often than not. Just don’t go in expecting old-school mummy adventure. This version would much rather chatter its teeth at you in the dark and ruin your sleep schedule.

Lee Cronin's The Mummy (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/lee-cronins-the-mummy-2026/

Buffet Infinity (2026) | Buffet Infinity feels like someone found a cursed VHS tape of late-night commercials and somehow made it strangely hilarious. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.3/10. I went into Buffet Infinity mostly because the trailer looked weird enough to grab my attention, and weird it most definitely is. This is one of those movies where, within the first few minutes, you’re either thinking, “Oh, this is going to be my kind of bizarre,” or already wondering if someone accidentally changed the channel to a forgotten Canadian cable station from 1993 at 2:17 a.m.

Buffet Infinity takes place in a time warp inspired by ‘80s and ‘90s late-night TV. It starts with a barrage of logos before launching into those homemade commercials. It feels oddly authentic, like someone found a dusty VHS tape in the attic and decided to make a horror-comedy universe out of it. The Crossroads shopping complex acts as the center of the madness. Buffet Infinity itself sits among a collection of local businesses, and before long, it becomes very clear that weird things are happening around town. And evolving fast. Not “the vending machine ate my dollar” weird. More “something feels deeply wrong here, but I can’t stop watching” weird.

It is evident that director Simon Glassman knows exactly what tone he wants to capture by copying the tone of SCTV through cutting various commercial clips, including bizarre commercials, weird local advertisements, and strange news broadcasts. Some of these commercials are actually very funny. Ahmed’s Pawnshop ads were easily among my favorites and felt like the kind of thing you’d half-laugh at while also wondering, “Wait… did this actually air somewhere?” There’s some genuinely funny stuff buried in the chaos.

What impressed me most is that despite the endless stream of weird, low-budget commercials and outlandish skits, there’s an actual storyline happening underneath all the absurdity. The characters and businesses begin forming this sinister, interconnected small-town narrative, and it works surprisingly well for a while. The movie absolutely nails the nostalgic feeling of fake local TV programming, sparking memories of cheesy commercials, weird infomercials, and the kind of low-budget broadcasting you’d stumble across while aimlessly flipping channels before streaming existed and stole all our patience.

That said, Buffet Infinity eventually runs into the same problem many experimental genre films face. It starts loving its gimmick just a little too much. The middle section feels stretched way beyond what the premise can comfortably support. At some point, I found myself thinking, “Okay, this needed someone in the editing room armed with scissors and zero emotional attachment.” A leaner cut would have done wonders here, or alternatively, expanding the actual story to match the runtime could have helped justify the wandering pace.

The ending also didn’t land as hard as I hoped, even with the slight nod to one of my favorites, Bad Taste, buried in there. After all the interesting yet bizarre buildup, it left me wanting something stronger. It’s brilliantly crafted and undeniably creative, but once the novelty wears off, Buffet Infinity ends up drowning in its own brilliance.

Buffet Infinity (2026)

For fans of analog horror and deeply unconventional filmmaking, this might be right up your alley. For everyone else, your mileage may vary somewhere between “hidden gem” and “what in the VHS Massacre did I just watch?”

https://jackmeat.com/buffet-infinity-2026/