This Is Not a Test (2026) | This Is Not a Test proves you don’t need zombies to lose brain cells - just watch & listen to these classmates for 103 minutes. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 4.8/10. If there’s one thing This Is Not a Test doesn't even bother doing, it’s easing us into the apocalypse. Nope. This movie hits you with a quick morning argument and then immediately goes, “Cool, anyway, here are some full-speed, cardio-loving zombies trying to eat your face.” No slow burn, no ominous news reports in the background…just BAM, civilization is over before breakfast.

We follow Sloane, played by Olivia Holt, who, judging by the amount of blood she’s wearing like it’s a fashion statement, has already had a very rough first day. By the time she and four classmates make it to Cortege High, it’s clear she didn’t just Uber her way through the apocalypse. Naturally, once they barricade themselves in the gym, the movie decides, “Wait, let’s rewind,” and we jump back to see how Sloane got from point A (normal teenage stress) to point B (covered in blood and questioning everyone’s intelligence).

And oh boy…the decisions. The group apparently had a chance to head toward a potentially safe military zone, but thanks to impatience, because waiting in line during a zombie outbreak is apparently where they draw the line, they go rogue instead. Bold strategy. Not a smart one, but definitely bold.

The flashbacks also sprinkle in some character backstory, including Sloane’s father, who seems to have graduated top of his class in “How to Be the Worst Parent Imaginable.” It’s heavy-handed and feels more like it wandered in from a completely different movie, but hey, nothing says zombie apocalypse like unresolved trauma.

Back in the present, the group dynamic falls apart faster than society did. They start arguing almost immediately, which is impressive considering they’re surrounded by sprinting zombies who treat doors like piñatas. And speaking of those zombies…what exactly are they? One minute, they’re Olympic-level sprinters, the next, they’re lying face down in the street like they’ve clocked out for a lunch break. It’s less “terrifying undead threat” and more “confused extras waiting for direction.”

Then there are the little logic gems that make you tilt your head. Like the nurse’s office situation. Were there two sets of keys? Was Sloane just planning to deliver food via telepathy? It’s these moments where This Is Not a Test quietly became a test…of my patience.

Also, shoutout to Cary (played by Corteon Moore), who seems to vanish from the movie like he unlocked a secret invisibility perk. Either the writers forgot about him, or he’s off starring in a completely different sequel. If so, that is a brutal tease.

At the end of the day, This Is Not a Test looks solid. There’s clear production value, decent pacing early on, and some intensity in Sloane’s journey. But it never quite figures out what it wants to say or do. Instead, it settles into a cycle of weak drama, questionable decisions, and zombies that can’t decide if they’re marathon runners or professional nappers.

This Is Not a Test (2026)

It’s not offensively bad…just painfully forgettable. And in a genre where you’re competing with decades of brain-chomping gems, being forgettable might be the real apocalypse.

https://jackmeat.com/this-is-not-a-test-2026/

Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die (2026) | A rogue AI threatens humanity, so naturally, the future sends Sam Rockwell to recruit people in a diner to save the world. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 7.4/10. Well, that was a fun flick. The opening of Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die wastes absolutely no time telling you what kind of flick you’re in for. A mysterious “Man From the Future,” played armed with mayhem by Sam Rockwell, bursts into a Los Angeles diner and bluntly informs a group of random, very annoyed patrons that they’ve been specifically selected to help him save the world from a rogue artificial intelligence. That’s it. That’s the pitch. No slow burn, no gentle world-building. Just Rockwell acting like a caffeinated time traveler who skipped several doses of sanity. And it’s perfect.

After that absurdly direct introduction, the film rewinds a few days to begin introducing the people who will eventually fill those diner seats. First up are Mark and Janet, played by Michael Peña and Zazie Beetz, whose storyline unfolds during a school shooting that the movie treats with an intentionally bizarre sense of “business as usual.” The kids are so buried in their phones that they barely register the chaos, which lands as a pretty sharp jab at modern tech addiction. The teacher at least knows they’re awake, because they never look up from their screens. It’s uncomfortable, but also hilariously on point.

From there, the movie splinters into several character threads that slowly start weaving together. Susan, played by Juno Temple, introduces a storyline revolving around cloning. Always a topic guaranteed to start arguments at family dinners and science conferences alike. Then there’s Ingrid, played by Haley Lu Richardson, who suffers from an extremely unusual allergy that becomes both a character trait and a clever piece of world-building. Her segment dives into virtual reality culture with some pointed social commentary about living life inside headsets and digital escapism. Let’s just say if you’ve ever spent a few too many hours inside VR on your Quest 3, you might feel personally attacked.

What’s impressive is how confidently director Gore Verbinski puts all these ideas into the same blender. Technology obsession, cloning ethics, AI apocalypse fears, brain rot caused by social media use. It’s all in there, and it’s all being satirized in this meat grinder. Sometimes it feels like someone took a bunch of Black Mirror episodes and just went crazy with the budget.

Case in point. Even the heroes look shocked when a giant minotaur-cat hybrid casually roams the streets eating teenagers. TBH, their reaction is fair. I say that because it perfectly summarizes the movie’s energy.

If there’s one thing holding Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die back slightly, it’s that the film sometimes feels like it’s not quite sure how hard it wants to commit to its darker tendencies. We get razor-sharp satire, deliciously dark humor, and the visuals can get downright haunting. But with the film’s violence? Sometimes it feels like the film wants to go hard but doesn’t quite commit enough. It’s not quite sure if it wants to be playfully chaotic or fully commit to the brutal madness of the dystopian world.

Thanks largely to Rockwell’s unhinged performance and a story that constantly throws new wild ideas at the screen, this flick ends up being a gleefully weird cinematic experiment. And while you are enjoying this strangely insightful trip, remember, Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die!

Good Luck, Have Fun, Don't Die (2026)

https://jackmeat.com/good-luck-have-fun-dont-die-2026/

Bodycam (2026) | Bodycam starts with a pretty intense setup…then slowly drives straight off a cliff once the goofy meme monster shows up. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.2/10. Bodycam starts off like it’s ready to punch you straight in the face and then…unfortunately spends the rest of the movie searching the cutting room floor. Looking for its momentum. That’s a shame, because the opening sequence legitimately had me, and sets up what could have been a very tense supernatural thriller.

The story kicks off when two police officers respond to a suburban house call that quickly escalates into a nightmare. Officers Jackson (Jaime M. Callica) and Bryce (Sean Rogerson) first screw-up by shooting a man and his infant child. From there, the situation only gets stranger, darker, and far more supernatural than I had expected. It’s a strong premise, and the beginning of Bodycam really leans into that effectively.

Callica and Rogerson both give reasonably solid performances as Jackson and Bryce. They feel believable enough as officers thrown into an escalating crisis, though the script doesn’t exactly make it easy for the audience to root for them. In fact, one of them becomes pretty difficult to sympathize with, right away. I thought the moral gray area could have been interesting if the film had put more focus on it, but instead, it mostly uses it as fuel to push the story into chaos.

Now I’ll admit upfront. I generally loathe the found footage genre. Shaky cameras, characters making terrible decisions, and the inevitable “why are they still filming this?” problem annoy me. Bodycam tries to sidestep that by using police body camera footage as its framing device, which is technically still found footage but at least comes with a built-in reason for the cameras to exist. In this case, the documentary-style approach actually works in keeping the suspense up.

Sadly, that promising setup is the high point of the film.

For a while, things still hold together. Even when the supernatural elements start creeping in, the movie manages to maintain some intrigue. Then the film makes a very questionable decision. It introduces a bizarre meme-looking monster that I absolutely did not need to see. Sometimes less is more, and this was definitely one of those times. If the choice is between showing a goofy creature design or letting our imagination run wild while focusing on possessed followers and unseen horrors, I’ll take imagination every time.

Once that creature shows up, Bodycam starts losing steam quickly. Add in some sequences that feel suspiciously inspired by the whole “backrooms” internet trend, and the film begins to feel less like a focused horror story and more like a grab bag of familiar found-footage tropes.

The effects are also inconsistent. Some scenes look quite good, including one moment featured in the trailer that genuinely works. But others, like a driving sequence later on, look noticeably rough and pull you right out of the experience.

To its credit, the movie does deliver a few effective scares. I thought writer/director Brandon Christensen recently had a handi-cam move marathon and realized after The Puppetman, he would give the genre a shot. At times, Bodycam almost feels like an homage to the found-footage style, tossing in a variety of familiar tricks and ideas.

Bodycam (2026)

Still, despite its flaws, I’ll give it this. It’s better than that Blair Witch crap. And coming from someone who usually runs screaming from found footage, that might be the nicest compliment I can give it.

https://jackmeat.com/bodycam-2026/

Who took home the Oscars in 2026 | One Battle After Another takes home the Best Picture trophy. Read on for the full list and a summary on CNN. #jackmeatstv

Here is the full list of winners:

Best picture

One Battle After Another

Best Actor

Michael B Jordan - Sinners

Best Actress

Jessie Buckley - Hamnet

Director

Paul Thomas Anderson - One Battle After Another

Best Supporting Actress

Amy Madigan - Weapons

Best Supporting Actor

Sean Penn - One Battle After Another

International Film

Sentimental Value

Documentary Feature

Mr Nobody Against Putin

Original Screenplay

Sinners - Ryan Coogler (not sure what about this was "original." great? sure.)

Adapted Screenplay

One Battle After Another - Paul Thomas Anderson

Original Score

Sinners - Ludwig Goransson

Original Song

Golden - KPop Demon Hunters

Animated Film

KPop Demon Hunters

Visual Effects

Avatar: Fire and Ash - Joe Letteri, Richard Baneham, Eric Saindon and Daniel Barrett

Costume Design

Frankenstein - Kate Hawley

Cinematography

Sinners - Autumn Durald Arkapaw

Documentary Short Film

All the Empty Rooms

Best Sound

F1 - Gareth John, Al Nelson, Gwendolyn Yates Whittle, Gary A Rizzo and Juan Peralta

Production Design

Frankenstein - Tamara Deverell and Shane Vieau

Makeup and Hairstyling

Frankenstein - Mike Hill, Jordan Samuel and Cliona Furey

Film Editing

One Battle After Another - Andy Jurgensen

Best casting

One Battle After Another - Cassandra Kulukundis

Best animated short

The Girl Who Cried Pearls

Best live action short

• WINNER (TIED): The Singers
• WINNER (TIED): Two People Exchanging Saliva

CNN has a summary page being updated with the highlights.

https://edition.cnn.com/entertainment/live-news/oscars-academy-awards-03-15-26

https://jackmeat.com/who-took-home-the-oscars-in-2026/

Suitable Flesh (2023) | A stylish blend of psychological thrills and Lovecraftian horror played out on an 80s/90s stylistic stage. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 5.6/10. I have discovered something rather interesting about Suitable Flesh. From the opening scenes, the film has a quirky and sensual pace that appears to have emerged from the late-night shelves of the VHS section in 1987 and has decided to stick around for a while. Directed by Joe Lynch and loosely based on the works of the infamous horror author H.P. Lovecraft, we have just enough elements of the psychological horror genre, the supernatural, and the steamy elements of the 90s thriller genre…just enough to keep things interesting.

At the center of the madness is Heather Graham, who plays psychiatrist Elizabeth Derby. When one of her young patients shows up with a disturbing story involving his father's behavior and hints of something deeply unnatural, Elizabeth does what any rational professional might do. She becomes completely obsessed with the case. Naturally, that curiosity drags her deeper and deeper into a mystery involving some seriously questionable life decisions.

I thought Graham was actually a pleasant surprise. Her performance has a bit of intensity that works well with the story’s descent into obsession and paranoia. She manages to keep things cool with all the insanity around her, but also leans into the film’s pulpy tone when things inevitably go off the rails. Watching her slowly unravel as the truth creeps closer works. It was kinda important when the plot starts heading into full-blown Lovecraftian territory.

Just the vibe of Suitable Flesh sets it apart. The movie has no problem lapping up the aesthetic of the classic 80’s horror genre, while adding the high-tension erotic thrills of the 90’s. From the lighting to the atmosphere that the synthesizers bring to the classic beats of the storytelling, the overall feel of the movie is like a love letter to a time in which horror was weird, sexy, and a little bit crazy at the same time. And it kind of works.

Joe Lynch clearly understands the kind of film he’s making. Rather than trying to modernize the material too much, he leans into the pulpy feel. What this does is create a story that gradually increases in psychological suspense before launching into its supernatural elements in ways that are both creepy and darkly entertaining. Twists and turns happen, as do some creepy revelations and scenes that will cause you to raise an eyebrow and think, “Well… that escalated quickly.”

You can definitely smell that Lovecraft influence, but it’s not ever really like an adaptation. Instead, it’s taking those ideas of cosmic horror and forbidden knowledge, and the sense of identity slipping away to something ancient and unknowable. It’s giving the thriller a creepy element to it.

Suitable Flesh (2023)

In the end, Suitable Flesh is a fun, stylish ride that mixes psychological drama, supernatural horror, and nostalgic genre vibes into something oddly mesmerizing. It’s weird, a little provocative, and completely comfortable embracing its throwback roots. For fans of Lovecraft-tinged horror or anyone who enjoys a good descent into obsession and cosmic madness, this one makes for a pretty entertaining trip down a very strange rabbit hole.

https://jackmeat.com/suitable-flesh-2023/

Cold Storage (2026) | When a space fungus escapes containment, 2 employees & Liam Neeson face the worst night shift imaginable in this slimy horror comedy. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.2/10. If you ever thought the biggest danger from Skylab crashing back to Earth in 1979 was a chunk of metal landing on someone’s Buick, Cold Storage would like to politely inform you that the real problem might have been a killer fungus hitching a ride home.

The film opens with some simple text exposition explaining that most of the scientific experiments aboard Skylab were destroyed during re-entry. The keyword here is “most.” And if horror movies have taught us anything, it’s that the remaining 1% is always the thing that wipes out humanity. We’re quickly shown the consequences when a surviving container becomes a roadside tourist attraction in a small town. Naturally, something escapes the tank and proceeds to wipe the place off the map in messy, fungal fashion.

Enter three scientists tasked with containing the outbreak, including Robert Quinn, played by Liam Neeson. Quinn and company manage to collect a specimen while demonstrating exactly how fast this nightmare spreads, before solving the problem the traditional cinematic way: by erasing the entire village from existence. Containment achieved… mostly.

Cut to Teacake (Joe Keery), a guy just trying to get through a regular shift at his storage facility job. Unfortunately for him, the night shift is about to become the worst career choice of his life. Joining him is Naomi (Georgina Campbell), the facility’s new security employee, who also seems destined to discover that “biological containment failure” was not listed in the job description.

Like most creature features, Cold Storage relies on a fair share of questionable decision-making to keep things moving. Doors get opened that absolutely should stay closed. People investigate noises they should absolutely ignore. But the film leans into the absurdity just enough that it becomes part of the fun instead of a frustration.

The humor here is dark but effective. It never quite drifts into the full camp territory of The Return of the Living Dead, though the zombie-like infected and the generous amounts of green slime spraying around definitely give off that vibe. The movie also strikes a nice visual balance between practical effects and CGI. Bursting spores, twitching limbs, and fungal tendrils creeping through vents all feel tactile and gross in the best possible way.

Neeson is clearly having fun playing the grizzled bioterror operative who treats this bizarre fungal apocalypse with complete seriousness. Watching him deliver deadpan one-liners while saving the world is half the entertainment. Meanwhile, Keery and Campbell have solid chemistry. Keery, in particular, manages to separate this character nicely from his Stranger Things persona.

What Cold Storage does best is walk the thin line between ridiculous and semi-serious. If it went too far into parody, it becomes a joke. Play it too straight, and the movie collapses under its own weirdness. Instead, it lands comfortably in that late-night popcorn zone where you’re laughing, and occasionally wondering why anyone thought keeping that sample was a good idea.

Cold Storage (2026)

The ending doesn’t exactly hide its intentions either. The possibility of what comes next is hinted at well before the sequel tease, so when the reminder arrives, it feels less like a surprise hook and more like director Jonny Campbell giving us a knowing wink. If the next shift is anything like this one, I am in for another round of gooey fun.

https://jackmeat.com/cold-storage-2026/

The Secret Agent (2025) | The Secret Agent looks fantastic and nails the 70s vibe, but the slow pacing and drawn-out conversations nearly put me into hibernation. #jackmeatsflix

My quick rating - 6.9/10. It’s been a while since I managed to watch every nominee in the Best Picture lineup, but this year I get to make an educated guess at the eventual winner after watching all 10. Unfortunately, The Secret Agent probably won’t be the one taking home the big trophy.

Set in Brazil during 1977, the film follows Marcelo, a quiet technology expert played by Wagner Moura. He is on the run and trying to reconnect with his son. His journey leads him to Recife during Carnival, which sounds like the kind of crazy celebration where someone on the lam might blend in nicely. Wrong! The city quickly proves to be anything but a safe haven.

The Secret Agent opens with a montage of old photographs and upbeat music that paints the era full of "great mischief". Almost immediately, though, things get strange in that artsy “this might mean something or it might just look cool” way. One early scene features police standing near a dead body that seemingly has nothing to do with them, just lying there like an awkward party guest no one wants to acknowledge.

After some road travel through genuinely gorgeous scenery, we arrive at Part 1: Boy’s Nightmare. Marcelo settles into an apartment building run by the warm and seemingly innocent Dona, played by Tânia Maria. Naturally, when someone is introduced as adorable in a thriller, your brain immediately starts asking how long that innocence will last. The building houses a variety of refugees and oddball residents, including a cat with two faces that looks like it wandered in from a completely different genre. Symbolism? Possibly. Reoccurring nightmare? On the way.

Director Kleber Mendonça Filho doesn’t shy away from the grisly when the moment calls for it. A shark-related scene involving a body and a missing leg proves that point pretty quickly. Meanwhile, the story splinters into other threads, including a grim execution sequence in São Paulo that suggests multiple storylines will eventually connect.

Part 2, Identification Documents Service, slows things down considerably. In fact, it slows them down so much that some conversations stretch far beyond the payoff. It takes nearly two hours before the film finally snaps back to life with a moment that, without spoiling anything, gives someone a very literal “leg up” on the sexual revolution. Yes, the movie suddenly wakes up just long enough to remind you it has a sense of humor buried somewhere inside its moody runtime.

Part 3, Blood Transfusion, arrives with about 40 minutes left and finally delivers some real urgency. A shootout turns graphic quickly, reinforcing the director’s commitment to showing violence without flinching. At some point, the storytelling approach becomes more interesting. I missed exactly when we first see it, but students listen to old tape recordings documenting past events. The film visually reconstructs what they’re hearing as the story unfolds.

Visually, The Secret Agent is excellent. The production design nails the 1970s look, especially the cars, and Recife feels like a living, breathing character rather than just a backdrop. The film is packed with eccentric personalities played by an equally eccentric cast, keeping the atmosphere unpredictable.

Moura gives a solid performance, but it’s far too subdued for me to give him the Best Actor nod. Marcelo spends most of the film operating at the same emotional volume level, which doesn’t always match with what is swirling around him.

The Secret Agent (2025)

In the end, what could have been an inventive political thriller ends up feeling like a collage of familiar Brazilian themes. Corruption, nostalgia, and political tension - without enough weight to tie it all together. It’s technically accomplished and looks great, but dramatically hollow and, frankly, way longer than it needed to be.

Sometimes, style carries a film a long way. Here, it carries it 20 minutes shy of three hours…which was way too far in my eyes.

https://jackmeat.com/the-secret-agent-2025/